In some countries, small town-centre shops are going out of business because people tend to drive to large out-of-town stores. As a result, people without cars have limited access to out-of town stores, and it may result in an increase in the use of cars. Do you think the disadvantages of this change outweigh its advantages?

Recently, citizen in some nations has b
ecame
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become
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more preferable o
n
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to
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travelling to large shopping centres located far away from them to buy products rather than visiting small
shops
near their area. Even though
this
trend provides some benefits, I believe that the drawbacks are more significant.
Firstly
, leaving small
town
-centre
shops
abandoned will have a negative impact t
o
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on
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the e
conomy
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economic
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growth of the
town
. The profit of selling goods in these facilities will decrease significantly, leading to lower salaries for the staff.
This
movement will motivate workers in these
shops
to quit their job, causing a rise in the unemployment rate, which is particularly harmful f
or
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to
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the development of some local shop chains, or even the
town
’s shopping industry. Admittedly,
this
trend does have some benefits. Customers will be provided with a wider range of choices, which is a p
Correct your spelling
payback
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ay back
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payback
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for the l
onger
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long
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distance they have to travel. Shopping in these large shopping malls out of the
town
are said to be more c
onvinient
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convenient
and faster in comparison with in-
town
shops
w
ere
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where
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trading activities are restricted.
However
, i
t
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its
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impact on the environment is rather tragically. People are forced to use more cars and they will have to travel more on a daily basis to afford their needs.
Therefore
, there will be a rise in the carbon dioxide gas e
mmision,
Correct your spelling
emission
emissions
which will accelerate the global warming process, or even at the very least, will contaminate the air quality of the
town
.
For example
, in the villages near ShangHai city in China, the increasing popularity of cars h
as
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tohas
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l
ead
Wrong verb form
led
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to a t
erible
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terrible
air quality. People l
ive
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who live
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in these villages are likely to suffer from diseases like lung cancer or constant cough. In conclusion, even though customers will find it more enjoyable shopping in large supermarkets out of
town
, the consequences of
this
movement i
s
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are
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rather tragically. In my opinion, shopping in local stores is a better way to buy goods.
Submitted by Andy on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

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Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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