In achieving personal happiness, our relationship with family, friends, and colleagues are more important work and wealth. Do you agree or disagree with this?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Well, actually it is necessary
problem
Use synonyms
because a
lot
Use synonyms
of
people
Use synonyms
want to earn
much
Correct quantifier usage
a lot of
show examples
money
Use synonyms
and they
work
Use synonyms
very hard. The
people
Use synonyms
forgot about
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
family,
friends
Use synonyms
, and colleagues. It is not
industriousness
Correct article usage
an industriousness
show examples
person that
love
Change the verb form
loves
show examples
job
Correct article usage
a job
show examples
. In my opinion, they enjoy
then
Linking Words
earn huge abundance. In my view,
people
Use synonyms
divided useful and useless
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
show examples
, I would like to rewrite about both of them. It
seem
Change the verb form
seems
show examples
to me that, nowadays
people
Use synonyms
try to live convenient so they earn
much
Correct quantifier usage
a lot of
show examples
money
Use synonyms
. It is
Linking Words
first
Add an article
the first
show examples
reason why they do not spot
work
Use synonyms
and forgot about
vocation
Correct pronoun usage
their vocation
show examples
or do not want to relax. From my point of view
Linking Words
second
Correct article usage
the second
show examples
reason
Add a comma
,reason
show examples
Linking Words
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is
respect
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. The
people
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want to
respect
Use synonyms
themselves.
The humankind
Correct article usage
Humankind
show examples
love
Change the verb form
loves
show examples
themselves and try
live
Change preposition
to live
show examples
comfortable. To my way of thinking
third
Linking Words
, it is entertainment because a
lot
Use synonyms
of
people
Use synonyms
enjoy
funny
Correct article usage
a funny
show examples
lifestyle
Use synonyms
. They spend
much
Correct quantifier usage
a lot of
show examples
money
Use synonyms
dance
Change preposition
on dance
show examples
club
Fix the agreement mistake
clubs
show examples
, pub
club
Fix the agreement mistake
clubs
show examples
and so on.
As a result
Linking Words
, I think
people
Use synonyms
must earn a
lot
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of
money
Use synonyms
for
convenient
Replace the word
convenience
show examples
, for
respect
Use synonyms
and for entertainment
lifestyle
Use synonyms
.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, I think
people
Use synonyms
should
improving
Wrong verb form
improve
show examples
result
Fix the agreement mistake
results
show examples
and earn
much
Correct quantifier usage
a lot of
show examples
money
Use synonyms
for
Use synonyms
lifestyle
Correct pronoun usage
their lifestyle
show examples
. But we never forgot about
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
which
respect
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and help
you
Correct pronoun usage
us
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
, family,
friends
Use synonyms
, and colleagues. When we
work
Use synonyms
very hard every day. The
people
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step by step
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
not pay attention
our
Change preposition
to our
show examples
relationship with family,
friends
Use synonyms
, and colleagues. It is
Correct article usage
a seriously
show examples
seriously
Change the adverb
serious
show examples
problem
Use synonyms
for our
people
Use synonyms
who
work
Use synonyms
every day. We
try
Add the particle
totry
show examples
earn a
lot
Use synonyms
of
money
Use synonyms
and never forgot about
people
Use synonyms
who
very
Add a missing verb
are very
show examples
necessary for
you
Correct pronoun usage
your
show examples
lifestyle
Use synonyms
. The
people
Use synonyms
never pay attention
this
Linking Words
is
Use synonyms
problem
Add an article
a problem
the problem
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, it is small
problem
Use synonyms
in future
will
Correct pronoun usage
that will
show examples
be
huge
Add an article
a huge
show examples
problem
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
,
friends
Use synonyms
lost in touch, devise family and so on.
Hence
Linking Words
, it is important for our
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
past and future. We never forgot about for closer. In my view, we should
work
Use synonyms
very
hardly
Replace the word
hard
show examples
and earn
much
Correct quantifier usage
a lot of
show examples
money
Use synonyms
because a
lot
Use synonyms
of
people
Use synonyms
want to
life
Replace the word
live
show examples
rich. But we never forgot closer
people
Use synonyms
.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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