IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Open-plan offices offer a better working environment for staff than a normal office. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#open-plan #offices #offer #environment #staff #office
Office
Add an article
The office
show examples
 is
place
Add an article
a place
the place
show examples
 where every
employee
wish
Change the verb form
wishes
show examples
 to promote
their self
Correct pronoun usage
themself
themselves
show examples
 with better new ideas. Good ideas
needs
Change the verb form
need
show examples
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
 environment of surroundings. In
upcoming
Add an article
an upcoming
the upcoming
show examples
 paragraph, I will discuss
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
 atmosphere around staff with
wider
Correct article usage
a wider
show examples
 space
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
office
Correct article usage
the office
show examples
 area. Whereas, There are some people who like normal working type
office
.
At
Change the preposition
In
show examples
 the end, I will give my opinion. If I say about
good
Add an article
the good
show examples
 environment of
office
then
 many things to
be happened
Change to the active voice
happen
have happened
show examples
 after that.
First
 of all,
Good
Correct article usage
a Good
show examples
 area of
office
Add an article
the office
show examples
 is
wall
Add an article
a wall
the wall
show examples
 from where
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
 atmosphere
created
Add a missing verb
is created
show examples
 like proper good lighting with
warmfull
Correct your spelling
warmful
harmful
warm full
 pictures of group photos. For that, Good unexpected things are come out
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
employees
mind
Fix the agreement mistake
minds
show examples
.
For example
, Every manager of
office
Add an article
the office
an office
show examples
 should create one part of
office
Add an article
the office
show examples
 with good
warmfull
Correct your spelling
warmful
warm full
 lightning and picturing.
Therefore
, They held
everythings
Correct your spelling
everything
 in
this
 room like meetings, projects and so on.
Secondly
,
Open
Correct article usage
an Open
show examples
 space with no upside roof is just like dream for every
employee
.
In addition
,
employee
Add an article
the employee
an employee
show examples
 feels freshening with open fresh air and
not
Add a missing verb
do not
show examples
 feel uncomfortable with lots of stress. There are
also
small
Add an article
a small
show examples
 group of people who think that
perticular
Correct your spelling
particular
office
 is
best
Change the article
the best
show examples
 choice for them.
First
, it feels like up-to-date working life with
table
Correct article usage
a table
show examples
 and chair.
Employee
Fix the agreement mistake
Employees
show examples
 have chitchat to other
employees
 for their difficulties
next
 to their chair.
For example
,
employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
show examples
 have
chance
Correct article usage
a chance
show examples
 to create their room as per their wish with lots of photos at
desk's
Change the noun form
desks
desk
show examples
. We see
every where
Correct your spelling
everywhere
show examples
 that
office
 manager can arrange each section from where
employees
meets
Change the verb form
meet
show examples
 other
employees
 with short timings.
Therefore
,
Any
Change preposition
in Any
show examples
 critical situation they
meets
Change the verb form
meet
show examples
 up within
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 seconds.
Secondly
,
This
 kind of normal
offices
Fix the agreement mistake
office
show examples
promote
Change the verb form
promotes
show examples
 group works. Somewhat,
office
 workers share their work
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
show examples
 in any critical situation.
On
Change preposition
In
show examples
 conclusion, working life is too
hactic
Correct your spelling
hectic
 life
because
Add the preposition
ofbecause
show examples
 time management and all things.
Office
Add an article
The office
An office
show examples
 should be very comfortable
Change preposition
in
show examples
at
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
 very
Correct your spelling
quiet
show examples
quite
Correct your spelling
quiet
show examples
 place.
For
Change preposition
From
show examples
 my perspective,
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
upto
Correct your spelling
up to
 their choice which type of
office
 work should be done but for
me
Add a comma
,me
show examples
 open space is
best
Correct article usage
the best
show examples
 one for many reasons.
Submitted by shailpatel1101 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: