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Writing Samples
Band 7

The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of tree types of tutrients, which may be unhealthy if eaten too much.

The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of tree types of tutrients, which may be unhealthy if eaten too much.
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The given pie charts illustrate the
amount
Use synonyms
 of three different nutrients including sodium, saturated fats and added sugars in percentage in the USA.
Overall
Linking Words
, a glance at the charts reveals that the most significant sector in
two
Correct article usage
the two
show examples
 charts is related to
dinner
Use synonyms
 and it is obvious that the
amount
Use synonyms
 of added sugar in snacks is by far more than other additives. In the first
chart
Use synonyms
, the
dinner
Use synonyms
 sector compromised
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 average of 43%, which is the highest
amount
Use synonyms
.
Snack
Fix the agreement mistake
Snacks
show examples
 and breakfast represent the same
amount
Use synonyms
 of sodium consumption (14%), and for lunch, the average number is 29%. In the
second
Linking Words
chart
Use synonyms
, which shows the saturated fat added to
American’s
Change noun form
American
show examples
 meals like the previous
chart
Use synonyms
,
dinner
Use synonyms
 contains the highest
amount
Use synonyms
 (37%).
Likewise
Linking Words
,
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 first
chart
Use synonyms
, breakfast ,and
snack
Fix the agreement mistake
snacks
show examples
 provide less fat respectively 16 and 21 per cent.
Moreover
Linking Words
, lunch shows a lower
amount
Use synonyms
 of fat just more than a quarter, compared to sodium. The
third
Linking Words
chart
Use synonyms
 shows the sugar contribution in snacks is significant and nearly twice as the
dinner
Use synonyms
 sector. Lunch and breakfast made up 19 and 16 per cent of added sugar, respectively.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words amount, dinner, chart with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 8 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 6 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • nutrients
  • balanced diet
  • overconsumption
  • health risks
  • cultural dietary patterns
  • processed foods
  • portion control
  • government regulations
  • nutrition education
  • informed choices
  • saturated fats
  • trans fats
  • carbohydrates
  • sodium intake
  • public health
  • nutrition labels
  • dietary guidelines
  • caloric content
  • food groups
  • obesity
  • cardiovascular diseases
  • diabetes
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