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Band 3.5

The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing. Do you agree or disagree

#growth #shops #towns #cities
It is widely considered that growing online shopping will completely replace all
shops
 in towns and cities.
However
, I firmly believe that not all off-line
shops
 will close because some people want to do their shopping in person and some products can not be sold through online markets.
To begin
 with, some customers prefer to buy things from off-line
shops
.
For instance
, shoppers can check the quality of products they wish to buy in person or they can try it on to see if it is fit if it is clothing.
A research
Remove the article
Research
show examples
 on consumers satisfaction shows that compared to online shopping, they are
more happy
Replace the words
happier
show examples
what
Change preposition
with what
show examples
 they bought and,
therefore
, a return rate of
off-line
Correct your spelling
offline
show examples
 purchase
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 even lower than that of online purchase.
This
 clearly shows that online shopping is
preferable
Add an article
the preferable
a preferable
show examples
 way to do
shopping
Add an article
the shopping
show examples
 for some customers. On top of
this
, some
shops
 provide services only through
off-line
Correct your spelling
offline
show examples
 business.
For example
, fuel can only
purchased
Change the verb form
be purchased
show examples
 from fuel stations as buying it online can entail safety problems including
explosion
Fix the agreement mistake
explosions
show examples
.
This
 example illustrates that some commodities can not be purchased over the internet. To sum up, not all
shops
 will be closed because of popular online shopping. As some people want to do their shopping at local
shops
 to check everything is fine and some products are not able to be bought over online because of possible danger, there will still be some businesses operating their off-line
shops
.
Submitted by narsysos on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • e-commerce
  • brick-and-mortar
  • physical stores
  • online retailers
  • retail apocalypse
  • digital economy
  • consumer behavior
  • sustainability
  • commercial landscape
  • high-street
  • consumer trends
  • augmented reality
  • showrooms
  • carbon footprint
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