Science can now offer people a life expectancy of close to one hundred years or even more. Some people view it in a positive light, but others believe it creates some problems. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#science #offer #people #life #expectancy #years #light

People

in the past

wish

Wrong verb form

wished

show examples

to live forever nowadays,scientists improved

people

's living standards which improved

citizens

Change noun form

citizens'

citizen's

show examples

age .It has some benefits and drawbacks,

Correct word choice

but to

show examples

my mind the negative impacts outweigh the positive ones.In

this

essay,I will talk about both of them . Some individuals who are professional in their field like to live more to transform their experiences to others ,

as a result

, skilful citizens will increase in the community who progress life expectancy.

However

ages

Replace the word

aged

show examples

people

are involved in many health problems

which

Correct word choice

and

show examples

need to spend money

for

Change preposition

show examples

treatment

consequently

, the elderly are not as productive as before .Even their expenses will go over their advantages.Some countries

such

as Germany are faced with decreasing

young

Correct quantifier usage

number of young

show examples

people

with

increasing

Correct article usage

an increasing

show examples

elderly

Correct quantifier usage

number of elderly

show examples

who did not want to have children when they were younger. In my view, the detrimental effects of being old are more than useful impacts because if the population go up in the world ,

therefore

,human resources will decrease and many individuals

are

Wrong verb form

will be

show examples

in poverty.

For example

,in China after raising the age of families the ministry told most of the elderly live in a poor condition and can not work so they need welfare. In conclusion,notion interested in

live

Change the verb form

living

show examples

more but they will face to lack of food and facilities .Health issues which are difficult to cure will be popular and men need to spend most of their income on rehabilitation programs and wellbeing.The authorities should establish some programs in order to prevent disability in older

people

and be aware of the harmful effects of being so old in the future.

Submitted by rezakiannejad on Sun Dec 26 2021

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coherence and cohesion

Ensure a clear introduction and conclusion that summarize the main points and express your opinion clearly.

task achievement

Support your main points with specific examples and elaborate on them to strengthen your arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

256 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Science can now offer people a life expectancy of close to one hundred years or even more. Some people view it in a positive light, but others believe it creates some problems. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Technology is being used more and more in education. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

Some people get into debt buying things they don’t need and can’t ‎afford.What are the reasons for this behaviour?What action can be taken ‎to prevent people having this problem?

1. It has been suggested that cars and public transport should be banned from city centres and only bicycles be allowed instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In order to become a successful sportsperson, some people argue that you need to have access to the latest technology and the most up-to-date equipment. Other people believe that these things are not necessary for sporting success. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The government should ban smoking in all public places, even though this would restrict some other people's freedoms. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer.