Some people get into debt buying things they don’t need and can’t ‎afford.What are the reasons for this behaviour?What action can be taken ‎to prevent people having this problem?

#people #debt #don’t #can’t #‎afford #behaviour #action #‎to

Wonder syndrome from customers during shopping time is an interesting topic that some opponents want to explore the reasons what

happened

Wrong verb form

happens

show examples

for people have a specific product,

however

, shopping behaviour is a complex system

that is

designated through advertisement and the ability of customers

recognise

Fix the infinitive

to recognise

show examples

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

quality and price in speedy for choosing products which are not classified into a group of goods that are not essential for a routine life ,

moreover

, pendulous behaviour is the origin ability of human for assessing and calculating ,

however

, I am going to clarify the possible reasons . One first reason is the imbalance of quality and price that have not been well distributed based on society's needs and income,

however

, false information in advertisements is always the cause of customers who are not fittable behaviour for shopping .

Secondly

, the shopping environment might be a crowdy place or unsupportive for recognizing goods and create foggy thoughts in people's minds, in my experience, the arrangement of a shopping store is the

too

Rephrase

most

show examples

distinctive factor for having a good experience for choosing products in time. Third , in my personal experience ,when I am hungry or thirsty, I do have not a direct decision to buy a specific product. The

last

thing might be the demeanour of the seller is a hidden factor that influences your decision. When doubt arises, the better solution is to leave products and stay calm for a

while

after you can be able to have a snapshot for evaluation and come back if you want.

Submitted by h.ebrahimi66 on Mon Nov 27 2023

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coherence cohesion

The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. An effective essay should start with an introduction that presents the topic and a thesis statement, followed by body paragraphs that explain the reasons and suggested solutions, ending with a concise conclusion summarizing the main points.

coherence cohesion

The structure of the essay is confusing, with ideas not presented in a logical order. It's important to organize the essay with clear, ordered paragraphs where each one focuses on a single idea, including appropriate topic sentences and concluding sentences where necessary.

task achievement

The body paragraphs should contain distinct examples and explanations that support the main points. Be sure to add relevant, specific examples that directly relate to the reasons for and solutions to the problem of overspending and debt.

task achievement

Be sure to directly address the task by clearly explaining the reasons for the behavior and suggesting concrete actions that can be taken to prevent the problem. Each part of the question should be addressed separately and clearly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

256 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people get into debt buying things they don’t need and can’t ‎afford.What are the reasons for this behaviour?What action can be taken ‎to prevent people having this problem?

Fully explain your ideas

It is common for each member of family to have their own piece of modern technology. Some people think this will lead them to break down of family relationships and communication. To what extent do you agree?

Money is important in most people’s lives. Although some people think it is more important than others. What do you feel are the right uses of money? What other factors are important for a good life?

More and more students are choosing to study at colleges and universities in foreign countries. Do the benefits of studying abroad outweigh the drawbacks?

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rathe than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?