Some people argue that job satisfaction is more important than job security, while others believe that they cannot always expect job satisfaction, and a permanent job is more important. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion?

There are tremendously controversial perspectives heating up a debate over
criteria. While some hold a strong view that being satisfied with their
is more significant than a permanent
, the opposite makes a statement that staying in a
a long time is more pivotal.
each has its own perk, I would contend that it is ideal to combine both mentioned factors. Without a shadow of a doubt, being pleased with a vocation is one of the essential factors when
apply for an occupation.
satisfaction whose definition can vary from one to another helps
to boost their productivity and motivation while working.
Add an article
The working

The noun phrase Working environment seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
Change the form of the verb

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb being. Consider changing it.

show examples
the determinant should be mentioned.
For example
, Google, an internationally acclaimed technological corporation, provides not only canteens but
recreational rooms to refine their employee’s energy and to help them to release chronic stress when they are under pressure.
gratification plays a paramount significance in choosing a career. While the redeeming features of
complacence are widely acknowledged, it is unfair that those of
security are ignored. If
devote themselves to a long-term
, they will have a stable income.
For instance
, in Japan, enterprises pay their workers based on seniority. That means the more years
allocate to the firm, the higher their salary will be; so that their living standard will be guaranteed and be better. A permanent line of work is
an integral factor in landing a profession. In conclusion, either being complacent to the line of career or dedicating to a long-term
has a tremendous influence on how
consider an occupation, so combining both mentioned elements is optimal.
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Read more in the eBook

The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »

* free ebook for Premium users

What to do next:
Look at other essays: