Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required.

It is argued that the most
effected
Replace the word
effective
show examples
way of increasing public health is rising the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
of
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
facilities by some
people
.
However
, others think
on the contrary
way, that it would not give much impact,
thus
, it should be found other options as well.
This
essay will discuss both views and give my own opinion below too. On the one hand, it is already known that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
training with any kind of
sport
is extremely beneficial to the health conditions of the
people
.
In addition
, it climbs the strengths of the body and
give
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gives
show examples
much
Change the quantifier
many
show examples
possibilities to live with
fully
Replace the word
full
show examples
potential of
lifes
Correct your spelling
lives
show examples
without any difficulties
such
as being operated
or
Change preposition
on or
show examples
damaging body parts and being cut.
The
Correct article usage
A
show examples
bright example of
this
will be football
sport
which
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
incredibly famous around the world with
having
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
billions of fans,
consolidate
Wrong verb form
consolidating
show examples
peoples’ bones of the leg and arms.
Thus
, some
people
think that if it is made a lot of
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
facilities, the
populations
Fix the agreement mistake
population
show examples
will stand much healthier.
On the other hand
, it could be less to feel recognizable results and as much as many options should be found.
Furthermore
, building
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
complex
Fix the agreement mistake
complexes
show examples
and facilities do not mean
that whole
Change the determiner
that whole person
those whole people
show examples
people
will
Add a missing verb
be interest
show examples
interest
Wrong verb form
interested
show examples
in them. So, it should be found other sort of options.
For example
, directing
people
to consume
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
healthier
such
as having dinners or lunches with meals that
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
made with vegetables and fruits. In my opinion, with the construction and making
sport
conditions better, it is difficult to gain much success in the given objective. So, looking for other types will
also
be
huge
Add an article
a huge
show examples
advantage to make
people
more healthy and happy.
Submitted by abdullayev2000ulugbek on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • public health
  • sports facilities
  • physical activity
  • exercise
  • chronic diseases
  • heart disease
  • obesity
  • inclusivity
  • participation
  • safe environment
  • social interaction
  • community engagement
  • comprehensive approach
  • health education programs
  • environmental factors
  • healthcare infrastructure
  • quality healthcare services
  • public health initiatives
What to do next:
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