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Writing Samples
Band 5

With the development of social media, more and more youngsters are being allowed unsupervised access to the internet in order to meet and chat with friends which can lead to potentially dangerous situations. What solution can suggest to deal with this problem?

#development #media #youngsters #access #internet #chat #friends #situations
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Recently, the world development by technology and everyone easier to get internet for influence in life.
Moreover
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, Technology can
bringing
Change the verb form
bring
be bringing
show examples
 problems or effects. In
this
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 essay, the specific reason will be narrated and
then
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 give my own opinion on the matter.
Firstly
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, Parents should give attention to their
child
Fix the agreement mistake
children
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 about playing
Add an article
a game
the game
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game
Fix the agreement mistake
games
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 or social
Correct your spelling
media
show examples
median
Correct your spelling
media
show examples
 on
mobile
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a mobile
the mobile
show examples
Use synonyms
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
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. Because if a teenager
spend
Change the verb form
spends
show examples
 so much
time
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
playing social
median
Correct your spelling
media
show examples
, will bring
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
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 for themselves.
For example
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, Looking
on
Change preposition
at
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 the
phone
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 screen for a long
time
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,
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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effect
Change the verb form
effects
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to
Change preposition
apply
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your eyes. Because
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 a
phone
Use synonyms
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
blue
Add an article
a blue
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 light that it can make teenager getting eyes problem. According to, educate using a reason with youngsters about causes from
social
Add an article
the social
show examples
median
Correct your spelling
media
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.
For instance
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, some people
live
Correct pronoun usage
who live
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 in Thailand
using
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
Use synonyms
Add an article
the phone
a phone
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phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
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 for
chat
Wrong verb form
chatting
show examples
 enormously, and so dangerous they like to
using
Change the form of the verb
use
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 when crossing the road. It
make
Change the verb form
makes
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 some school identify their student about dangers from playing internet.
Secondly
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, teenagers should go outside to do
Add an article
an activity
the activity
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activity
Fix the agreement mistake
activities
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 with their friends or hang out.
This
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 is a good thing than talking with friends
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
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.
Furthermore
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,
do
Wrong verb form
doing
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 activities
such
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 as playing basketball can help
their
Correct pronoun usage
them
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 to
healthy
Add a missing verb
be healthy
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.
Moreover
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, it means they can play social median and allocation
time
Use synonyms
 appropriately.
Also
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, Parents can
helper
Replace the word
help
show examples
. If can separate
time
Use synonyms
, they will have
time
Use synonyms
 to self-knowledge or find themselves by
to do
Change the verb form
doing
show examples
 several activities. In conclusion, a parent should
supervised
Change the verb form
supervise
show examples
 their child for dangers of social
Correct your spelling
media
show examples
median
Correct your spelling
media
show examples
 by using reason.
However
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, teenagers should go outside to do several activities with their friends not only spend so much
time
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
playing
phone
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by patty50015 on

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Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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