More young people spend less time on their weekends and holidays to do activities outdoors in a natural environment. What are the reasons? What might encourage young people to do outdoor activities?

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Recently,

increasing

Add an article

an increasing

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number of

youth

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, they

choose

Wrong verb form

chosen

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spent

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spend

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time

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to stay

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staying

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home on

weekend

Fix the agreement mistake

weekends

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or holidays and

spent

Wrong verb form

spend

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less

time

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to do

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doing

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outdoor

activities

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. Personally, science and technology developed in the world that makes many indoor

activities

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which is video games, mobile games, television or international and parent busy at work.

Parents

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and

schools

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are

the

Correct article usage

show examples

important

role

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roles

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to encourage

youth

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to outdoor and connect natural environment, they can help

youth

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to do outdoor

activities

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. Nowadays, science and technology

gives

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give

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young

people

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different life. Young

people

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attracted

Add a missing verb

are attracted

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by distinct games and TV shows.

For example

Linking Words

, many

game

Change to a plural noun

games

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are own same target which

is make

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makes

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young

people

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Change the verb form

apply

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challenge

highest

Correct article usage

the highest

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levels and get awards.

In addition

Linking Words

, television plays series which make

they

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

want to know the ending cause

them

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they

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continue

watch

Add the particle

to watch

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and shows which interesting make them laugh.

Moreover

Linking Words

Parent

Fix the agreement mistake

Parents

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spent less

time

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for

Change preposition

with

show examples

Use synonyms

youth

Correct article usage

the youth

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. Many

parents

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are busy at work, so they

were have

Change the verb form

had

show examples

time

Use synonyms

to accompany their children, and children usually stay home by them-self.

therefore

Linking Words

youth

Use synonyms

like to go indoor

activities

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more than outdoor

activities

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However

Linking Words

parents

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and

schools

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should encourage and help young

people

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to do outdoor

activities

Use synonyms

. Young

people

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like to natural environment

activities

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or not depend on

parents

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and

schools

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, if they can cause their interested which is

parents

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arrange weekend

activities

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such

Linking Words

bush walk

Correct your spelling

bushwalk

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, swimming, climb mountain and

schools

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can organize camping or small trip. In doing so,

youth

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have

other choice

Change the wording

another choice

other choices

show examples

, they will not just stay home. In conclusion, young

people

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can

spent

Change the verb form

spend

show examples

time

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in outdoor

activities

Use synonyms

but may need someone to help and guide them.

NikkyWed Jan 26 2022

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

268 words

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More young people spend less time on their weekends and holidays to do activities outdoors in a natural environment. What are the reasons? What might encourage young people to do outdoor activities?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Some people think that parents have a great influence on their children. Others believe that the media is a bigger influence. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

There are many reasons that can motivate a person to stay working for the same company. Some believe that money is the main reason. Do you agree or disagree?

With the rise of e-books comes the decline in paper books. Some people see this as a good step forward while others do not. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

Some people think that it is better to travel by car in the city others think that traveling by car is better discuss both views and give your opinion.