Some people think job satisfaction is more important than job security,while others believe that having a permanent job is better than enjoying the job . Discuss both views and give your own opinion?

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Introduction

There is an ongoing debate between two groups of

people

Use synonyms

whether

job

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satisfaction

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is necessary or not rather than

job

Use synonyms

security. I deem that either of them has their own perspective . So , I will discuss both views in the upcoming paragraphs before giving an opinion regarding

this

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Body · 1

On the one hand ,working with

satisfaction

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in any field is crucial to make a good bond with colleagues in work zones .

This

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is because if employees are happy at

jobs

Correct pronoun usage

their jobs

show examples

,it reduces the stress and working load among them . In

this

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way , individuals mental health become better and they can spend a good time with their family after working hours .

For instance

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, according to a survey by Oxford ,University it can be seen that the working environment became well when employees have patience and politeness while active in their tasks.

Body · 2

On the other hand

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Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

permanent jobs have their own merits

such

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people

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do not have any worry about future earnings . Because well-paid

job

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also

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change the living_standard of

people

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and it has

also

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secured their future income. To cite an example of India,। Government teachers grasp many advantages in the long -term the period since they get a retirement pension .

consequently

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,it is not only good for them even

also

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for their family.

Body · 3

In my point of view, in

this

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modern era, a better budget and a permanent

job

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play an indispensable role in everyone's life

instead

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job

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satisfaction

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. The reason behind

this

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is that the demand for expensive things increases day by day so ,

that is

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why it is too important that we earn more and grab constant employment in our life .

Conclusion

To conclude,

although

Linking Words

working with

satisfaction

Use synonyms

mitigate the tensions and make a good bond among

public

Add an article

the public

show examples

but

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

career security has a great influence on

people

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in long-term benefits . According to my perception , a permanent

job

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satiates our all desires in life so ,it is more important than that.

preetshergill197

Jan 26, 2022

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.5

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

332 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

job
work
happy
enjoy
like
feel good
safe
steady
money
pay
income
plan
life
family
health
stress
risk
grow
learn
skill
future
balance
choice
option
example
in my view
on the other hand
therefore
early
later

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Some people think job satisfaction is more important than job security,while others believe that having a permanent job is better than enjoying the job . Discuss both views and give your own opinion?

Some children spend hours every day on smartphones? Why is this the case ? Do you think this is positive or negative development?

In recent years, the structure of a family and the role of its members are gradually changing. What kinds of changes can occur? Do you think these changes are positive and negative?

Today single-use products are still very common. What are the problems associated with this? What are some possible solutions?