IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

the seven various primary hobbies of the adult resident in a small Tunisian town in three different years with twenty years intervals,starting from 1980.

#seven #hobbies #adult #resident #tunisian #town #three #years #twenty #intervals
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The given bar chart illustrates the information about the seven various primary hobbies of the adult resident in a small Tunisian town in three different years with twenty years intervals,starting from 1980. Overall, There was the same popular rate of all seven activities in 1980,after four decades, TV and Movies was the most favourite activity of adult. According to the bar chart,it can be seen that in 1980, All seven activities had the same popular rate,accounting for 100. After 20 years passing, the number of people watching TV and Movies rose moderately to 130.
Similarly
Linking Words
, the number of reading books and working out experienced a slight increase with the figure 117 and 105 respectively.
In contrast
Linking Words
, There was a downward trend in Banking, Gardening and Playing video games, dropping to 95 and 83 and 70 consecutively. In 2020, with a similar sharp acceleration of watching TV and Movie, its amount reached 160, making it was the most popular activity.
This
Linking Words
 figure was significantly higher four times than that of playing video games. The corresponding for reading book,working out, bankings were approximately 133 and 110 and 90.Gardening was lower than that,but still,its number was higher than playing video games. The latter had only 40 of the total amount.
However
Linking Words
, there was a period of stability of 100 in the amount of playing music.
Submitted by Kris1412_pany on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: