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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some feel that schools should be mixed with both girls and boys attending while others feel the genders ought to be separated. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Co-ed schools have been commonplace in many countries.
Whereas
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 some critics argue that it is the ideal teaching model for
students
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, others believe that male and female
students
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 should be taught separately. I agree with the latter as single-sex education has a myriad of benefits for
students
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. Some critics concur that a co-ed
school
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 allows
students
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 to be better prepared for the real world.
This
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 is because a co-ed
school
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 is a microcosm of the real world where males and females collaborate. In a co-ed
school
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,
students
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 have innumerable opportunities to interact with people from the other
gender
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 to build up their people skills and understand the nuances between the male and the female.
This
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 allows them to be better at dealing with individuals from the other
gender
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 when they grow up.
However
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, I believe that single-sex education is superior. For starters, there are fewer distractions in uni-sex schools.
Instead
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 of being bothered by relationship issues, which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 prevalent in co-ed schools,
students
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 could concentrate on their academic studies. On top of that, when
students
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 study in a single-sex
school
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, they are less likely to be exposed to
gender
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 prejudices. In a
mix-sex
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mixed-sex
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school
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,
for instance
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, children are often discouraged by stereotypes like boys are naturally better in science subjects than girls.
In contrast
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, in a single-sex
school
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,
students
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 are not being compared to the opposite
gender
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 and they are encouraged to get the best out of themselves. In conclusion,
although
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 having both genders studying in the same institution prepares
students
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 for the future, it is much more redounded to the development of the children if they are in a single-sex
school
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 as they have much fewer distractions and they are
also
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 not hindered by
gender
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 biases.

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task response
The essay provides a clear response to the topic question, addressing both views and presenting a clear opinion. However, there could be more detailed development of the ideas with stronger supporting examples.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a logical structure and follows a clear pattern of introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, there is room for improvement in connecting ideas within and between paragraphs to enhance coherence.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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