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Band 3

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

#businesses #emphasise #products #development
It is a common belief that
this
 is more affected by
people
 companies introduce their goods as new things.
However
, there is a more persuasive
arguments
Correct the article-noun agreement
argument
show examples
 that the way is not good effect to consumers because it
just
Add a missing verb
is just
show examples
 trickery. On the
on
Correct your spelling
one
show examples
 hand,
people
 want to revolution and find various products and they get feeling of satisfaction through
this
 action.
Also
,
people
think
Add the particle
tothink
show examples
express
Wrong verb form
expressing
show examples
 their own personality is very important and it can
made
Wrong verb form
make
show examples
themselves
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 one and only so
then
 it is connected to
people
 find fresh things. Plus, it is able to positive competition between firms to invent technology and innovation.
Nevertheless
,
this
 method can give
bad
Correct article usage
a bad
show examples
 impact
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
people
 who
are targeted
Change the verb form
have targeted
show examples
advertising
Change preposition
by advertising
show examples
 from the corporations that use the manner.
First
, it just
focus
Change the verb form
focuses
show examples
 on the new so
concern
Wrong verb form
concerned
show examples
 and
people
 may miss the important point
such
 as design, practicality, cost and ethical problem.
For example
, many companies care about only design because
people
 need
new
Correct article usage
a new
show examples
 appearance so it caused
they
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
lose
Fix the infinitive
to lose
show examples
 function.
Next
, corporations
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 able to exploit the promotion to bad parts.
For instance
, If they launch some new rare products to expensive prise and there will be a lot of
people
 who want to buy that so it leads to overheating. To sum up, while there are some positive points that modern businesses are highlighting new things but it is evident that
people
 can receive negative parts from companies that promote
this
 method.
Submitted by vezeta0504 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • emphasise
  • advertising
  • products
  • innovation
  • competitive strategy
  • consumer dissatisfaction
  • value
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