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Band 4

social media is becoming increasingly popular amongst all age of groups. however sharing a personal information on social media websites does have risks. do the advantages of social media otweigh the disadvantages?

#media #age #groups #information #websites #risks #otweigh
People
 from all age
of
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groups are recently showing more tendency towards social
media
. There is no doubt many
people
 rely more on the internet for the latest news and updates.
Although
 its use has drawbacks
such
 as
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a threat
the threat
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threat
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threats
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 to privacy, I personally believe that the benefits of using social
media
 surpass it. On the one hand,
the
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apply
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social
media
 is known as a renowned platform to connect
each
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with each
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 other. With the help of
this
 digital
platform
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platforms
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such
 as Instagram, Facebook and Whatsapp,
people
 all over the world can communicate
to
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with
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 family and friends who live in another part of the universe.
For instance
, my friend who lives in the UK stays in touch with me by using
online
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an online
the online
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 platform. We conduct
regular
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a regular
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meeting
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meetings
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 on
Zoom
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the Zoom
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application
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applications
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 in order to improve our fluency in English.
In addition
,
the
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popular website like Linked-in
facilitate
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facilitates
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people
 to obtain a
high
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highly
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 qualified
job
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jobs
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. There are
hundred
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hundreds
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 of companies available and offer various jobs. The applicants do not have to drop in or meet in person
otherwise
 they update the qualifications on the websites and discover the compatible work.
On the other hand
, the utilization of social
media
 leads to
security
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a security
the security
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problem
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problems
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. Posting personal information may put our lives
in
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at
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 risk.
For example
, unauthorized websites claim
for
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apply
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sensitive details and it would not be
availabe
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available
 until you provide access to it.
As a result
,
this
 brings
the
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security problems. To illustrate, the worst impact of
this
 threat is the hacker easily steals the information and tracks your presence. It is because you are simply monitored through social
media
.
In other words
, our lives are threatened.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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