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Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some people like to travel to somewhere new and different when they go on holiday, while others prefer familiar places Do you think there are more advantages or disadvantages to visiting new places?

#people #travel #holiday #places
It is true that many
people
 take a holiday during the year and they book their holiday or have been purchased ticket on holiday earlier but there are cons and pros visiting
to
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
a new
place
 together with
familiar
Add an article
a familiar
show examples
place
.
To begin
 with, if
people
 travel to
new
Add an article
a new
the new
show examples
place
, they can learn everything that it can be culture, new worldview and understanding of the meaning of
life
.
Therefore
,
Add an article
a human
the human
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human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
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 can try to adopt a new
place
life
then
, maybe they can attempt to eat unusual food that
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 never tried . A new journey has learned to tourists many-sided
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
life
 aspects.
Thus
, it might be stressful because
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the middle of
city
Add an article
the city
a city
show examples
 is bustling. In my point of view at the
beginning
Add a comma
,beginning
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 some
people
 have been a little bit scared
because
Add the preposition
ofbecause
show examples
 new area not home. Anyway,
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 advantage of sides
are
Change the verb form
is
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 very important because
people
 can see ancient creatures before they have never seen. I think
,
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apply
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people
 go to
familiar
Add an article
a familiar
show examples
place
Fix the agreement mistake
places
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that
Correct word choice
where
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 they have not learned anything because already
known
Wrong verb form
know
show examples
 most of
things
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the things
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
there.
Furthermore
, they have a great option because they have never
confused
Add a missing verb
been confused
show examples
. On top of that nothing is not attracted them. They have almost chance why because
this
 knew that which is items to avoid and what type of belongings are cheaper or foods like that. they don't feel incredible delighted because there is no reason to be pleased and most
part
Change to a plural noun
parts
show examples
 of
country
Add an article
the country
show examples
are
Change the verb form
is
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 not new. To sum up, I totally agree with that to visiting
new
Add an article
the new
show examples
 area because
people
 can
understan
Correct your spelling
understand
 of
meaning
Add an article
the meaning
show examples
 of
life
 when
people
 can travel
new
Change preposition
to new
show examples
 parts of
world
Add an article
the world
show examples
.
Submitted by Weallneedit9 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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