IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people work for the same organisation all their working life.Others think that it is better to work for different organisations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some
society
Fix the agreement mistake
societies
show examples
work
Use synonyms
 at the identical system all their activity
life
Use synonyms
. Another
think
Correct your spelling
thing
show examples
 that it is better to effort for various organisation. Some people do not like any change, they like to uniformity and
that is
Linking Words
 why they
endeavor
Change the spelling
endeavour
show examples
 all
life
Use synonyms
 the same
managment
Correct your spelling
management
. For them , the workplace becomes an integral part of their
life
Use synonyms
 and is connected with their job solidly. Other categories of
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
 prefer to
work
Use synonyms
Change preposition
in
show examples
various
institution
Fix the agreement mistake
institutions
show examples
their
Change preposition
in their
show examples
 activity
life
Use synonyms
 and they enjoy it themselves. Maybe there is
other
Change the wording
another
show examples
 reason for
this
Linking Words
.
Firstly
Linking Words
,maybe they get bored of their job and collective
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and like to
work
Use synonyms
 with
other team
Change the wording
another team
other teams
show examples
 in another field.
As a result
Linking Words
, these categories of nation avoid homogeneity.
Secondly
Linking Words
, they are not satisfied with the same salary and they want more and more.
Thirdly
Linking Words
, they are not able to
work
Use synonyms
 in the identical field and are always dismissed job them via their ability and behaviour. To conclude, both sides have their own advantages. You know, many
population
Change to a plural noun
populations
show examples
 think that they effort the same enterprise they ascend through
this
Linking Words
work
Use synonyms
 and do a career. They believe that making a career is very important in
life
Use synonyms
 and
thus
Linking Words
 they achieve success in their
work
Use synonyms
. Others think, that they make a lot of friends by working in different places, and they want to connect with many
nation
Change to a plural noun
nations
show examples
 by changing their working place. In my opinion, I think, people should
work
Use synonyms
 in the same grouping. If people are knowledgeable in their field , they will surely reach great heights.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Longevity
  • Corporate ladder
  • Adaptability
  • Comfort zone
  • Professional network
  • Diverse skill set
  • Industry exposure
  • Innovation
  • Resilience
  • Seniority
  • Job market
  • Career trajectory
  • Company culture
  • Professional growth
  • Job security
  • Promotion prospects
  • Cross-functional experience
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