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Band 4

Many adults nowadays prefer spending their free time playing computer games. Why do they do this? Is this a positive or negative development?

#adults #time #computer #games #development
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Nowadays, adults are wasting their free
time
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 playing video
games
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 on the
computer
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. In my opinion, there are two reasons why
people
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 prefer to use their leisure
time
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 on
computer
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games
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.
However
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, spending a lot of
time
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 on the
computer
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 is a negative development because of the
computer
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's impact on the physical
health
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 and social conversations of
players
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. On the one hand, many
people
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 play
games
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 owing to relaxation. Adults work in a place which is a competitive and stressful environment, and these
people
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 have no long
time
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 for other activities , so
that is
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 why they choose
computer
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games
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. Most of the benefits of computers
that
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are that
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 are portable
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and
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can be carried to any place and any
time
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 easily. It is not easy that
computer
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games
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 have a lot of fans
on
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apply
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Correct pronoun usage
apply
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this
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,
instead
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 of developments of technology, the game industry
also
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is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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developed to have numerous features that
players
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 can choose the game match
with
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apply
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their personal taste which
create
Correct subject-verb agreement
creates
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 relaxation and excitement for the
players
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.
On the other hand
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, adults spending too much
time
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 playing
games
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 on computers damage their physical
health
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 and social conversations. In fact, there are no physical exercises and movements when
people
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also
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 attack their eyes after spending several hours sitting in front of a screen,
this
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 leads to back and neck pain or obesity.
In addition
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, they may become an introverted person unnoticeably, which will make them lose some relationships like friends, peers or maybe family. In conclusion, even though playing
computer
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games
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 in their free
time
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 offers relaxation and convenience to
players
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, it
also
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causes to
Verb problem
affects
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 their
health
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 and social
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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.
Consequently
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, if they use their
time
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 to participate in some clubs with friends and exercise, that can help them build their
health
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 and social life.
Submitted by jakedth162 on

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