The tendency of human beings copying each other is shown in popularity of fashion clothes and consumer goods. To what extent do you agree?

In
this
era of globalisation, lifestyle has changed a lot and people try to adjust to the varied situations.
As a result
, many things have changed
such
as rules, technologies, and crowd fashion. As we are living in a modern world humans started to copy the outfits of
western
Capitalize word
Western
show examples
culture and
also
Rephrase
apply
show examples
this
is an opportunity for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
retailers to grab profits by selling products that are essential within that decade.
However
, from my ,perspective it is a good development considering the developing world, of course.
To begin
with, being like someone else is considered to be a merit, but
nevertheless
, it has its own downside as well.
Furthermore
, to talk about the advantage, a society can enhance their standard of living by comparing to other western groups, so that their parents and guardians could know how important is it for the public to get involved in
this
earth especially related to education.
For example
, no sooner
does
Verb problem
is
show examples
one
expose
Wrong verb form
exposed
show examples
to modern fashion and tradition than he can keep up with nature. Not only to keep himself updated on the planet but
also
to increase the literacy rate. On the negative side, we can see by matching to others as the same as a modern community
then
Rephrase
apply
show examples
the local practice can
be disappeared
Wrong verb form
disappear
show examples
entirely and so
do
Verb problem
can
show examples
the goods that have been
producing
Wrong verb form
produced
show examples
locally.
Therefore
,
it is clear that
the elder crowd do not like these actions which have been done by the youngsters. To cite an example, hardly
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
one
immigrated
Wrong verb form
immigrates
show examples
to a foreign country when more beings would be attracted to it and eventually
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
culture of a small particular area could be demolished.
To conclude
, seeking
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern society and copying their trend is a part of the development and there are a plethora of benefits,
however
, there are humans who contradict
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
idea.
Submitted by milan on

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task response
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coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, but the essay lacks a clear logical structure. The main points are not well connected, and the essay would benefit from better organization and coherence.

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