IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The Government Should Ban Smoking In All Public Places, Even Though This Would Restrict Some People’s Freedoms.

#government #ban #places #people’s #freedoms
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Everyone has the freedom to make their own decision to
smoke
Use synonyms
 or not to
smoke
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.
However
Linking Words
, most people who do
smoke
Use synonyms
 know that it is harmful to their health but due to
but due to
Remove the redundancy
apply
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the craving / the addiction they continue the use.
Smoking
Correct article usage
A smoking
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ban
Use synonyms
 in public places severely restricts a person’s opportunities to
smoke
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. They will start controlling the urge to
smoke
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 till they find a place. In the long run, they will be able to control their craving and may reduce their tobacco use. Even though
initially
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 most
smokers
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 will feel that their freedom is restricted, some may understand the benefit to themselves after a while. The other part of
this
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 issue is the hazards of
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second hand
Add a hyphen
second-hand
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 smoking. If smoking continues unabated in public places, the general public will suffer from similar health complications. Studies have shown that passive
smokers
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 will
also
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 develop respiratory problems, lung cancer and other diseases.
This
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 has already become a public health issue
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
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 can
also
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 affect the unborn baby of a pregnant lady. It is high time we found a solution. To conclude, there are compelling reasons for the government to
ban
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 smoking in all public places. If
such
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 a
ban
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 is implemented with measures to educate the public about it
then
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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smokers
Use synonyms
 too will understand the importance of
such
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Use synonyms
ban
Correct article usage
a ban
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.
Furthermore
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, if the
smokers
Use synonyms
 were
also
Linking Words
 educated about the treatment available to help them to quit smoking, some may even stop smoking completely.
Submitted by Farhanamodi28 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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