Some employers involve their emoplyees in their decision-making process. Do the advantages outwiegh the disadvantages?

#employers #emoplyees #process #outwiegh

this

democratic society, it is generally acknowledged by certain individuals that it is beneficial when employers allow their

workers

to participate in

decision-making

Add an article

the decision-making

show examples

procedure

Fix the agreement mistake

procedures

show examples

However

Add a comma

,However

show examples

there are some drawbacks. Regarding

this

, I strongly believe that the benefits overwhelm the drawbacks. On the one hand, decisions that are designed by employees may not

realistic

Add a missing verb

be realistic

show examples

as they cannot consider the financial state of their companies.

For example

, a recent media in Korea reports that some employees

dicided

Correct your spelling

decided

to change some manufacturing machines which are costless so that the investment dominated the

outcoms

Correct your spelling

outcomes

outcome

As a result

, the

revene

Correct your spelling

revenue

was reduced due to the excessive investment. As the example clearly illustrates, since

workers

do not know

sophisticated

Add an article

the sophisticated

show examples

financial state of their companies, it is hard to allocate budgets wisely.

On the other hand

, I believe that involving

employess

Correct your spelling

employees

for

Change preposition

show examples

a company's

decision

is practical because factually,

wrokers

Correct your spelling

workers

work

Change preposition

show examples

a real field rather than employers.

Therefore

, actual

workers

are the best people who know

practical

Add an article

the practical

show examples

situation

Fix the agreement mistake

situations

show examples

in their companies. In

this

regard, they can figure out the most productive and practical way to improve

producivity

Correct your spelling

productivity

For instance

, in a hospital in Korea, employers asked their subordinates to think

how

Change preposition

about how

show examples

to provide more kind services to customers as the subordinates deal with actual customers.

Therefore

, they could easily make a

decision

to improve customer services. Regarding

this

, it is reasonable to point out that making a

decision

that is

involved by

workers

is beneficial. In conclusion, while I accept that

employess

Correct your spelling

employees

can sometimes be rather unrealistic to make a

decision

, there is no doubt to point out that it is

good

Change the article

a good

show examples

idea to involve them because they are the best people who know a practical environment.

Submitted by hiasince38 on Sat Mar 26 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

282 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country., while others believe that the government should control salaries and limit the amount people can earn. Discuss both views and giye your opinion.
Nowadays, money is the main cause of happiness,and it has a significant impact on our lives. In other words, It is rolling everything. Nevertheless, there is a distinct in salaries between individuals. A wide range of them are obtaining an extraordinary income, while others are obtaining an ordinary income. Therefore, a diverse range of people are assuming that this can have a beneficial effect on a country, and others are convinced that the government should play a critical role in this argument and impose some limits. In this essay, I will elaborate on both views.
5.5
band
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.
The internet is becoming available to everyone as people now have access to the latest news at their fingertips via smartphones. I completely agree that this had reduced the number of people reading the newspapers. I will explore some the reasons for this change.
5
band
space exploration is much too expensive and the money should be spent on more important things. to what extent do you agree or disagree?
With the recent advancements in technolog, the idea of finding a new planet where humankind can reside is becoming more and more poupular. Since exploring space is a costly program, some people argue that this fund should be allocated to more essential areas. I agree with this point of view, and in the following essay, my idea will be supported with some rationale and examples.
4
band
Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn’t sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
In our contemporary era, it has been debated whether someone is supposed to work during the study. The majority of the society believe that it is good practise receive some knoledge and might impove other skiils while others think that the time after school is a leisure time for break and activities. To examine both ways of understang, this essay will examine both point of view and give my view.
4.5
band
You recently noticed a local restaurant that was offering a part-time job. Write a letter to the restaurant's manager. In your letter, explain that you would like to apply for the job give some details of any relevant experience that you have specify the days and times that would suit you
I am writing in response to your advertisement which was placed in the Valley street dated 17 April 2024 . I would really appreciate it if you spare some of your time discuss about my experience and skills.

Some employers involve their emoplyees in their decision-making process. Do the advantages outwiegh the disadvantages?

Include an introduction and conclusion

In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country., while others believe that the government should control salaries and limit the amount people can earn. Discuss both views and giye your opinion.

space exploration is much too expensive and the money should be spent on more important things. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn’t sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.