Some people think young people are suitable for learning foreign languages. Other people think adults are suitable. Discuss both and give your opinion.

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It is a highly debated issue whether young age is the best stage to learn distinct languages or the adult.
This
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essay intends to analyse both views
along with
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my perspective. To commence with , why individuals are in the favour of childhood period
is
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as
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the effective way to become a multilingual person
.
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?
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The most predominant one is the spare time which is available in the early years of human life. To explicate
it
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, they can learn anything without any hesitation and hectic schedule which is primarily found in the later years.
For example
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, a headline from the famous channel BBC (BRITISH BROADCASTING CORPORATION) revealed that 50% of children got the highest marks in the foreign language tests because they
gain
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gained
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knowledge about grammar
as well as
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vocabulary in kindergarten.
Thus
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, all of these reasons
are allured
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encouraged
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the young generation to broaden their horizons.
On the other hand
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, there are numerous causes behind the learning of strange languages in the adulthood stage. The most prominent one is the well-developed brain which provides assistance for gaining knowledge within a short term. To explain it, they do not need tutor guidance at every step and surfing all doubts on the website
due to
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the advanced technology in the competitive scenario.
For instance
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, a survey was conducted by the Education Department in 2011, they found that 9 out of 10 adults finished their course with satisfactory scores owing to the mature life stage. So, they can get easily information from online sources about
the
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apply
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other languages as they are mature. In conclusion,
although
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a few multitudes argue that the young generation can
be benefited
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benefit
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from learning a language at an early age
but
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I believe that the advantages of adult age
are outweighed
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outweigh
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them because of holistic development
as well as
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intellectual growth.
Submitted by lovepreetkaur2725 on

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coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is weak, and the introduction lacks proper organization. The essay lacks supported main points and clear comprehensive ideas. The relevant specific examples are insufficient, affecting the overall task response.
task achievement
The task response is incomplete and lacks clarity. The ideas are not supported with specific examples, which affects the overall coherence of the essay.
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