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Writing Samples
Band 5

Because many children are not able to learn foreign languages, schools should not force them to learn foreign languages. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#children #languages #schools #force
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Our world’s official
language
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 is
English
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Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
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therefore
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 people and the government choose to
study
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 and teach the
language
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, so learning
foreign
Add an article
a foreign
show examples
language
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 is now normal for everyone,
according to
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apply
show examples
there must be
Add an article
an advantage
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advantage
Fix the agreement mistake
advantages
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 for able to speak
foreign
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a foreign
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language
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 so where the place is not familiar to the foreign
language
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such
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 as
English
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, obsessed with
teach
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teaching
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 their children to have
better
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a better
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 life and be competitive.
This
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 system is concentrated in
specific
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a specific
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country
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countries
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such
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 as Asia. Being able to speak
foreign
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a foreign
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language
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 is good
however
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 if
students
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 do not even fully comprehend their own
language
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, I do
no
Correct your spelling
not
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 think school should force them to
study
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.
By
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With
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increasing
Correct article usage
the increasing
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number
Correct article usage
the number
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 of using
a
Correct article usage
apply
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cell
phone
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phones
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, teenagers use
slangs
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slang
show examples
 to communicate with their friends rather than using formal words. In Korea, for that reason, lack of literacy is
concern
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a concern
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,
students
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 do not have
ability
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the ability
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 to comprehend the meaning of words. Despite the
fact
Add a comma
,fact
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students
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 are currently studying
English
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on
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at
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high
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a high
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 level and absolutely they remember lists of vocabulary that they do not
understanding
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understand
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 of it. There will
no
Add a missing verb
be no
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 meaning
of
Change preposition
in
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 learning languages if they are not able to understand
they
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 own
language
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. While the problem is still highly growing,
student’s
Fix the agreement mistake
students’
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 parents always desire their children to be
talent
Replace the word
talented
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 at everything. According to that many
students
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 are forced to
study
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 foreign languages after school lessons to earn
good
Add an article
a good
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mark
Fix the agreement mistake
marks
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 on the school test,
that is
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what
Correct word choice
why
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 schools should stop
select
Wrong verb form
selecting
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English
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ascompulsory
Correct your spelling
as compulsory
compulsory
 subject which parents and
student
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students
show examples
 have no choice to stop
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study
Wrong verb form
studying
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 on
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second
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the second
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language
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.
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Nevertheless
Add a comma
,Nevertheless
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 even schools do not choose
English
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 as
compulsory
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a compulsory
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 subject,
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the student
a student
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student
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students
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 will have less pressure
on
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to
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Use synonyms
study
Add an article
the study
a study
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 the
language
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 they do not understand , and in the future people who need the
language
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 will choose to
study
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 by their own choice. In conclusion, I believe that the government will have
smart
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a smart
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choice
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choices
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 for student’s future and think
where
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about where
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students
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 can spend their potential rather than focusing on foreign
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language
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languages
show examples
.
However
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, we
cannt
Correct your spelling
can't
can not
 deny
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the fact that
English
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 is
also
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 important for some people, we will need to
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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