Every country should have a free health service, even if this means that the latest medical treatments may not be available through the service because they are too expensive. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Good
health
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and
wellbeing
Correct your spelling
well-being

The word wellbeing doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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are essential to humans life. To
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

effect, I strongly agree all nations of the world should have a free primary healthcare system to cater for the immediate illness of
her
Correct pronoun usage
their

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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citizens. Nowadays, the rate of sicknesses and diseases is alarming.
Death
Correct article usage
The death

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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toll increases rapidly by the day.
Majority
Correct article usage
The majority

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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of
persons
Replace the word
people

The word persons doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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are limited due to
lack
Correct article usage
a lack

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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of funds to carry out medical treatment on themselves,
as
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

a
Remove the article
apply

The indefinite article, a, may be redundant when used with the uncountable noun humanity in your sentence. Consider removing it.

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result
Add the comma(s)
,result

It appears that you are missing a comma or two with the interrupter as a result. Consider adding the comma(s).

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humanity is alarmingly decreasing.
Furthermore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, hospital bills are extremely expensive for the common man to employ their services. In
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

regard,
relatively
Correct article usage
a relatively

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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amount of citizens
resort
Change the verb form
resorts

The plural verb resort does not appear to agree with the singular subject amount. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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to
self medication
Add a hyphen
self-medication

It appears that self medication is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

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that
Correct pronoun usage
which

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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leads to a more severe ailment and sometimes death.
Although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, modern medical apparatus, treatment and medicine may not readily be available to patients at
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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government clinics and hospitals. It is paramount for
policy makers
Correct your spelling
policymakers

The word policy makers seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

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to provide 'a
no
Add the preposition
with no

It appears that you are missing a preposition with the verb provide. Consider adding the preposition.

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pay' immediate treatment to the citizens as a means of managing the
health
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

of a patient whilst proper
arrangement
Fix the agreement mistake
arrangements

It seems that arrangement may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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will be done with respect to seeing a medical consultant or a doctor
to
Change the verb form
apply

It appears that the verb to tend should be in the bare infinitive form. Consider removing to from in front of this verb.

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tend to the derailing
health
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

of the individual. As the saying goes " a stitch in time saves nine".
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

act will reduce the financial burden on
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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society.
Provision
Correct article usage
The provision

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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of free
health
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

care will help a country to be highly productive and do exceedingly great economically. Every country should and must have
a free
Correct the article-noun agreement
free health facilities
a free health facility

The indefinite article a may not be required with the plural noun facilities in this sentence. Consider removing the article, or changing the noun to singular.

show examples
health
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

facilities.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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