IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Some people say it is manufactures and supermarkets responsibility to reduce the amount of packaing of products they sell and others say it us consumers responsibility to avoid buying products with too much of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #supermarkets #responsibility #amount #products #consumers
Although
people
 are not supposed to “judge a book by its cover”, in my opinion, it is inevitable that the appearance of something will influence what
people
 desire.
Hence
,
packaging
Correct article usage
the packaging
show examples
 of a product becomes one of the most essential aspects to boost a product’s popularity.
However
, using excessive packaging may lead to the waste of materials used.
Thus
, I believe it is necessary to be reduced. In order to do so, I believe both
manufacturers
 and buyers play an important role
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
this
. Supermarkets and factories produce items with excessive packaging to increase their products’ sales. When
people
 are going to buy something, it is natural for them to look for items that are attractive or pleasing to the eyes.
However
, if all
manufacturers
 or factories agreed to reduce their amount of packaging or standardise their packaging,
people
 would have no choice and comparison.
As a result
, the packaging will not matter as much.
Besides
, reducing the amount of packaging will benefit the
manufacturers
 since they need to spend less money to buy the packaging materials. I think
this
 is a win-win solution and should not be difficult to apply. Other than the
manufacturers
, consumers’ shopping habit
also
 needs to be changed. Even though it is their right to choose what to buy, I believe consumers should at least have awareness about the packaging of the product and how it becomes a waste of materials. If consumers prefer to buy products with less amount of packaging,
then
 the
manufacturers
 would be encouraged to produce items with less packaging to catch the consumers’ attention. In conclusion, I believe both consumers and
manufacturers
 have their own roles in reducing the packaging of the products.
Therefore
, it is not the responsibility of either the consumer or manufacturer only.
Submitted by shafiraxmt on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: