Some people believe that teenagers should concentrate on all school subjects. But others believe that teenagers should focus on the subject that they are good at or that they find the most interest. Discuss both sides and give more option.

#people #teenagers #school #subjects #focus #interest #option

Adolescence education appears to make a polemic discussion these days. There are several opinions on how

students

should master school

subjects

. Many agree the importance of all

fields

to be mastered by teenagers,

while

others believe only those who take the biggest interest should be concentrated by the pupils. I believe focusing on only a specific amount of

subjects

can give greater benefits for

both

students

in the present and future time. It is understandable that some people think all

subjects

are crucial to learn.

This

point reflected the fact that all

subjects

matter,

thus

, mastering every single one of them counts as a respect we pay to the founding fathers of sciences.

For example

, Indonesian schools tend to have a low tolerance attitude towards

students

with bad scores in either physics or geography, even though these two

subjects

are

in contrast

to each other, the teachers expect them to maximize in

both

worlds.

This

attitude comes often from the idea that all

subjects

need to be learned equally.

On the other hand

, minimizing the scope of

subjects

may benefit future science development. The human brain, especially young adults, has a limited capacity that plays a big role in giving and taking information. Narrowing the

subjects

by selecting those with the highest interest and pupils' capability may seem to be the effective way to reach

further

advances in various

fields

of science.

For instance

, assigning some kids to specifically focus on robotics and engineering can be an investment in future mechanical engineering business by creating a good quality of human resources in

this

particular field.

This

method helps to increase the level of productivity in many sectors.

To conclude

both

views reflect valid arguments. On one, challenging

students

with the urgency to conquer all

subjects

is a form of respect for the beauty of sciences,

while

making pupils only master some

fields

embrace an effective way to push the level of research and development in varied

fields

. I strongly agree with the one with a larger view of benefits. Some people believe that teenagers should concentrate on all school

subjects

. But others believe that teenagers should focus on the subject that they are good at or that they find the most

interest

Replace the word

interesting

show examples

. Discuss

both

sides and give more

option

Fix the agreement mistake

options

show examples

Submitted by hunnyfieddd on Wed Jan 31 2024

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Task Achievement

To improve Task Achievement, ensure that you fully address all parts of the question, providing balanced coverage of both sides of the argument and developing your ideas with specific examples or evidence.

Coherence and Cohesion

To enhance Coherence and Cohesion, focus on organizing your ideas more effectively, using a wider range of cohesive devices and paragraphing to clearly separate your points and lead the reader through your argument.

Task Achievement

Incorporate more detailed and relevant examples to support your main points, ensuring that these examples are directly linked to the points being made and contribute to the overall argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

379 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that teenagers should concentrate on all school subjects. But others believe that teenagers should focus on the subject that they are good at or that they find the most interest. Discuss both sides and give more option.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

With an increasing population communicating via the Internet and text-messaging, face-to-face communication will become a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

You are a student living in university accommodation. The heating has not worked for some time. Write a letter to the management. In your letter Explain why you complain; Describe the problems Tell what you want them to do

Some people prefer to live in a house, while others feel that there are more advantages to living in an apartment. Are there more advantages than disadvantages of living in a house compared with living in an apartment?

Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree? Provide relevant examples if necessary.

In some countries, university students live at home, while in other countries university students go to other cities rather than live with their family. Do you think the benefits of living away from home outweigh the disadvantages?