Some say that music, art, and drama are as important as other school subjects, especially at the primary level. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Over the past decades, the world has changed in a
fast-pace
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fast-paced
show examples
and hectic schedule, especially in the education and
children
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's
developments
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development
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. Some people dispute that
parents
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should be focused on their kids' learning activities,
such
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as teaching their personality and manner
instead
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of
other school subject
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another school subject
other school subjects
show examples
. I completely agree with
this
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opinion even though some people might have different aspects.
This
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essay will seek to examine the complex issue. On the one hand, I would like to point out that there are various reasons to consider learning soft skills in
a
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apply
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childhood. Before all else, playing
time
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at an early age plays a pivotal role to
develope
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develop
children
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physically and mentally.
Moreover
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, they deserve some duration before their dreadful all-day-long education
time
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. As a matter of fact, some scientists say it is ultimately important to count the sentiment of a child, which can drive them to a successful
life
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.
For example
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, if the
parents
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did not share enough
time
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to develop
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developing
show examples
communication and social skill with their
peer
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peers
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, they would not considerate of others.
On the other hand
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, I would like to express an equal view that there are several drawbacks
of
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to
show examples
this
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issue.
First
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of all,
parents
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tend to push their
children
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into education in order to pursue a straightforward
life
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.
Dispite
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Despite
the fact
parents
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always wish the best for
thier
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their
babies, they should not force their
children
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desperately in order to prevent negative
implication
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implications
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.
Besides
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, they can feel frustrated and self-disappointment
of
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with
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their inability to please their beloved
parents
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. In a worst-case scenario, they can even face the mental disorder if their
parents
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push them to the edge of
life
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. To avoid
this
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situation becoming any worse, people should relax and encourage their
children
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's
hobby
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hobbies
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, and give more
time
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in
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to
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parenting. In conclusion,
although
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there are some arguments and different opinions, I passionately believe that
children
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can start their young
life
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powerfully and peacefully with the help of
familiy
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family
members
instead
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of studying regular school subjects.
Submitted by tunnaungwin11 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • holistic development
  • fostering
  • emotional intelligence
  • problem-solving skills
  • cultural awareness
  • curriculum
  • engaging
  • memorable
  • nurture
  • talents
  • core subjects
  • academic
  • professional success
What to do next:
Look at other essays: