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Writing Samples
Band 5

An increasing trend is nowadays for young adult to play computer games. Some people say this is a negative development. Discuss and give your opinion.

#trend #adult #computer #games #people #development
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An increasing trend is nowadays for
young
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a young
the young
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adult
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adults
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 to play
computer
games
. Some people say
this
 is a negative development. Discuss and give your opinion. There is no doubt,
the
Correct your spelling
that
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 people copy others and buy the latest devices and use more and more model computers or laptops in the contemporary world. Some certain individuals believe that
computer
games
 give a detrimental effect
to
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on
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 the person and society. In my opinion, I think,
this
 behaviour offers dangerous results to each individual and the nation. On the
first
 hand, one serious effect
by
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of
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addicted
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addiction
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 to
computer
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a computer
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game
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games
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 is social withdrawal which means they tend to have a distance or a gap between family, people and
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society, which leads to unrespect or ignoring activities in the culture or postponed
his
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apply
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activities daily living.
For instance
, while playing hours and hours above mentioned single or group
games
 which show artificial intelligence, they have a limited period
for
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of
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 engaging family valuable time, for going out with friends, for social interaction as a responsible adult. It automatically delays and impossible to fulfil his job responsibilities and family or social needs.
Moreover
, when he is entertaining for
this
 a long time, he tries to lock the door in his room to minimize disturbance for his activities from the family. He
also
 does not eat
properly
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a properly
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 balanced diet which is important.
Thus
, he unknowingly gets health issues because of decreased physical
exercises
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exercise
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such
 as obesity, fluctuation
his
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in his
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 blood pressure, diabetes and cardiac diseases physically and anxiety or depression mentally. Ultimately, the user for excessive
games
 on the devices, if he goes to school or university that always might be complained by teachers or institute’s lectures as he will not maintain punctuality and failed to submit assignments the given duration properly, as well as he would receive fever sores in the exams and he has to postpone his continue education with values. It
also
 affects
on
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apply
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his siblings
this
his
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is his
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 action and
parents
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his parents
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 will have to spend more money on a particular child unnecessary.
This
also
 develops as a family conflict due to the tiredness
on
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of
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 the parents
for
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from
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 earning more money to complete family needs and in the
end
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,end
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 parents get old and
remains
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remain
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 unhappy families. In conclusion, the person who uses more
computer
games
 grows most of the time negative aspects of his life and family members and the society.
Submitted by rdbowalgaha on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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