Some people think that the government should be responsible for crime prevention while others believe that it is the responsibility of the individuals to protect themselves. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #government #crime #prevention #responsibility #individuals

Introduction It

is argue

Change the verb form

is argued

show examples

that it is

government's

Correct article usage

the government's

show examples

responsibility to take action

with

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show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

crime

prevention

while some

people's

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people

show examples

opinion states that

people

should know how to protect themselves from

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

criminals. In

this

essay, both mentioned views will be discussed. It is important that

government

must focus on

this

problem because it is related to

people

's daily life.

bureaucratic

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the bureaucratic

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sector is the one which can issue

prevention

measures because of its authority. There is

long-term

Add an article

a long-term

show examples

solution that the sector could advocate. One is to support

educational

Add an article

the educational

show examples

system.

This

is crucial because when a good education is provided to children,

this

simple solution could sustainably prevent those young

people

from being bad

people

Hence

, it is important that the problem of

crime

Add an article

the crime

show examples

must be focused

Change preposition

on by

show examples

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

. Even though the

government

fully supports

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

laws and penalties, in some situations,

people

still need to protect themselves from unexpected situations. Sometimes, when the populaces walk during the

night time

Correct your spelling

nighttime

show examples

, the cruel

people

are likely to

be appear

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appear

show examples

anytime

Change preposition

at anytime

show examples

Hence

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

educating

Replace the word

education

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

them in

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

the methods of physical

preventing

Replace the word

prevention

show examples

by themselves is

also

crucial.

Moreover

family

Correct article usage

the family

show examples

institute profoundly plays

Change the article

show examples

significant role

Change preposition

show examples

criminal

prevention

because

this

institute is the one which is able to teach

people

since they

was

Change the verb form

were

show examples

young. As mentioned,

this

also

a long-term solution for

crime

prevention

Thus

people

should know how to protect

Correct pronoun usage

themselves

show examples

from criminals and reduce

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

crime

. In conclusion, the

government

should deliberately focus on the problem of

crime

because it is directly related to social life.

Also

Add a comma

,Also

show examples

people

should practice themselves from invasion because of unexpected

situation

Fix the agreement mistake

situations

show examples

Submitted by suppawich.p on Wed May 11 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

263 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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Some people think that the government should be responsible for crime prevention while others believe that it is the responsibility of the individuals to protect themselves. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

***Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child's development while others think that it is important for children to go to school.*** ***Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion.***

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

lt is important to ensure that children with a wide range of abilities and from a variety of social backgrounds mix with each other at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countires women no longer feel the need to get married. Some people believe that this is because women are able to earn their own income and, therefore, do not require the financial security that marriage can bring. Do you agree or disagree?

Environmental protection should be the responsibility of politicians, not individuals as individuals can do too little. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child's development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion.