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Band 6.5

The graphs below give information about computer ownership as a percentage of the population between 2002 and 2010, and by level of education for the years 2002 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graphs below give information about computer ownership as a percentage of the population between 2002 and 2010, and by level of education for the years 2002 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#graphs #information #computer #ownership #percentage #population #level #education #years #summarise #features #comparisons
The bar charts illustrate the laptop possessors,
firstly
 as a
percentage
 of the
population
 in general and
then
considering
Change the form of the verb
consider
show examples
also
 the instruction level, between 2002 and 2010. The data clearly shows that the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of
people
 who held a
computer
 constantly increased every year between 2002 and 2010. In fact, in 2002 less than 60 per cent of the
population
 owned a
computer
. In 2004 the
percentage
 went up to 60 per cent and
then
, it overcame
this
 value in 2006.
Furthermore
, in 2008 the share of the
population
 who had a
computer
 was nearly 70%.
Finally
, in 2010 the
percentage
 rejoined the value of 80 per cent.
Similarly
, analysing the
population
 on the basis of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
education level, the proportion of
people
 holding a
computer
 rose between 2002 and 2010. Indeed, the
percentage
 of
people
 without
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 high school diploma increased by four times from 2002 to 2010,
whereas
 the
percentage
 of
people
 with
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 high school graduation went up to 70% in 2010
while
 it was only
near
Change the word
nearly
show examples
 40% in 2002.
Finally
, for
people
 with a bachelor's degree or with a postgraduate qualification, the increase
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
percentage
 was about 20% between 2002 and 2010.
Overall
, the bar charts demonstrate how the number of
computer
 owners significantly increased between 2002 and 2010.
This
 conclusion is evident from both the analysis of the
population
 in general and the study of
people
 considering their instruction level.
Submitted by lucabertoni7 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "finally".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, population, people, computer with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 6 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "went up" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 4 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • consistent increase
  • growing reliance on technology
  • clear correlation
  • digital divide
  • notable growth
  • most pronounced disparity
  • gap reduced considerably
  • percentage growth
  • higher educational levels
  • educational groups
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