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Writing Samples
Band 5

ending criminals to prison is not the best method of dealing with them. Education and job training are better ways to help them. Do you agree or disagree?

#criminals #prison #method #education #job
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There are many different opinions on the best way to reduce
crime
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. The traditional solution is to punish the
criminals
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 by putting them in
prison
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. Some hold the view that
education
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 and job training are the long-term solutions to cut
crime
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. In my opinion,
prison
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 is the only answer in a few situations, but in most cases
education
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, vocational training and rehabilitation are better.
Prison
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 is the only answer in
case
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the case
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 of
criminals
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 who are a risk to
the
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apply
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society,
such
Linking Words
 as murderers. They cannot be made to mix with society. Some
people
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also
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 say that
people
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 would not be afraid of doing
crime
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 if fear of imprisonment is not there. But I still feel that in
majority
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the majority
a majority
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 of cases, we can do without
prisons
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. In traditional
prisons
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,
people
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 learn a lot about
crime
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 and so when they leave
prison
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 they will commit even more
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crime
Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
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.
In other
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words
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,words
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prisons
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 act as universities of
crime
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. So petty offenders like
shop-lifters
Correct your spelling
shoplifters
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 and pick-pockets should be given some vocational training and
education
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. It is a
well known
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well-known
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 fact that the basic causes of
crime
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 are poverty, illiteracy and unemployment. So, if we provide
education
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 and job training
then
Linking Words
 we would be removing the causes of
crime
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. If
criminals
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 are rehabilitated by some form of employment
then
Linking Words
 they would certainly not re-offend.
Furthermore
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,
the
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apply
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prisons
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 are expensive to maintain. The government can spend that money on other important matters
such
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 as
education
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 and healthcare.
This
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 would ease some burden
from
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on
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 the government's shoulders. The petty and minor
criminals
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 can
also
Linking Words
 be employed in some community service projects after providing
education
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 and vocational training. Summing up, we should hate the
crime
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 and not the criminal. To fight
crime
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 we should focus on the causes of
crime
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.
Education
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 and job training help to rehabilitate the
criminals
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. So,
people
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 who commit less serious crimes should not be sent to
prison
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.
Focus
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The focus
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 should be on reforming them.
Submitted by theracevarsity on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Rehabilitation
  • Recidivism
  • Reintegration
  • Vocational training
  • Incarceration
  • Deterrent
  • Correctional facilities
  • Reformative justice
  • Social reentry
  • Ex-offender
  • Criminal justice system
  • Restorative practices
  • Penal system
  • Social marginalization
What to do next:
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