Some people believe it is a good idea for students to work part-time to ensure better opportunities in future. Others are of the opinion, job during study distracts the individual. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Working part-time for students can lead to better prospects in their careers

Linking Words

while

Punctuation problem

, while

show examples

some people are of the opinion that their jobs can

also

Linking Words

distract them from their studies.

While

Linking Words

experience

Use synonyms

will always help

but

Punctuation problem

, but

show examples

will

also

Linking Words

impact their academic results. Both

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

opinions are discussed in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

detail below. In my opinion,

Linking Words

Firstly

Fix capitalization

firstly

show examples

, a part-time occupation will provide more exposure to the student

especially

Punctuation problem

, especially

show examples

if the occupation is in the same area of study. It will help the students to get the confidence of meeting new people and

also

Linking Words

handle difficult situations at work

Punctuation problem

;

show examples

this

Linking Words

will help them to climb the corporate ladder. Real-time jobs can add more value and help them evolve as a person to cope with

practicalities of the

Correct word order

the practicalities of

show examples

society.

Additionally

Linking Words

, it will

also

Linking Words

serve as a good source of income for pupils. They can raise their own funds for their education

while

Linking Words

gaining real-time professional

experience

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

, working

while

Linking Words

studying can impact

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

academic results. A career can

also

Linking Words

be tough or demanding

Punctuation problem

;

show examples

extra working hours sometimes may result in less time for studies. Sometimes they might miss their extra classes because of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

work commitments

which

Punctuation problem

, which

show examples

hampers their

overall

Linking Words

course results. If they are dealing with any tension at their workplace, their concentration level

also

Linking Words

gets impacted

while

Linking Words

studying.

Hence

Linking Words

, a job

Linking Words

while

Change preposition

during

show examples

the ongoing academic year can take a toll on their studies.

To conclude

Linking Words

although

Linking Words

the part-time

experience

Use synonyms

can give a good amount of exposure and extra

income

Punctuation problem

income,

show examples

it might

also

Linking Words

take a toll on their study time. To overcome

this

Linking Words

, many universities have

adapted

Use the right word

adopted

show examples

only

Rephrase

apply

show examples

hours

Correct your spelling

40-hour

Change preposition

apply

show examples

monthly part-time

experience

Use synonyms

rule.

This

Linking Words

will help them maintain a balance between their work & academics.

akanshasrivastav137

May 30, 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task response

Use a clear intro that states the topic and your view.

Structure

Make one idea in each paragraph and link each to the question.

Content

Add one or two specific examples to show how work affects study.

Language

Check grammar and use short, simple sentences to avoid long chains.

Language

Use simple words and direct speech.

Structure

Finish with a short, clear conclusion restating your view.

Content

The essay shows a fair view on both sides.

Content

There is an effort to talk about how work can bring skill and money.

Structure

It has a clear end that restates the view.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

284 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

valuable work experience
enhance their resume
academic qualifications
practical experience
time management
communication skills
problem-solving
financial stress
educational resources
job prospects
academic performance
mental and physical health
divided attention
extracurricular activities
overall development

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Some people say schools should be responsible for teaching young adults to look after their health, others think this is not the responsibility of schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
To begin, these days few individuals think that teaching young adults is the responsibility of the academy, instead, others believe this is not an amenability to the institution. I partially disagree with this statement then I will discuss my views in detail in upcoming paragraphs.
6
band
life was better when technology was simpler. To what extent do you agree and disagree?
It is undoubtedly true that modern technology is a blessing for us and it is sometimes argued that our lives were easier when technology was less advanced. I personally do not agree with this statement and believe that the computer and the internet have made our life more better.
7
band
Some people think that students benefit greatly from going to private secondary schools, but others assert that private secondary schools have a negative impact on the young generation and the society alike. Discuss both views.
There are different views regarding the decision of students to continue their education journey in public or private secondary school. While some people argue that there are superior advantages to learning at private institutions, the critics predict more negative impacts that will be caused by them to the youth and community in general. This essay will see from both points of view.
6
band
some people think that libraries are a waste of ressources and money. so computers should replace them. however,others do not agree. discuss both sides and give your opinion
An array of masses believe that computers can be used instead of libraries since it costs money and resources while others do not agree with the concept. Still, most of the ageing population adores physical books over e-books because technology usage is difficult for them. However, I believe, computers are good alternatives to libraries since people can easily access online resources. Hence, both of these arguments are examined in this essay.
8
band
It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answers.
It is important for people to take risks in both their personal and professional lives. Taking risks can lead to new experiences and knowledge, which contribute to personal growth and satisfaction. In my opinion, the benefits of taking risks outweigh the drawbacks because people who take risks are often more fulfilled and capable of handling future challenges. In this essay, I will compare the benefits with the drawbacks of taking risks.

Some people believe it is a good idea for students to work part-time to ensure better opportunities in future. Others are of the opinion, job during study distracts the individual. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say schools should be responsible for teaching young adults to look after their health, others think this is not the responsibility of schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

life was better when technology was simpler. To what extent do you agree and disagree?

Some people think that students benefit greatly from going to private secondary schools, but others assert that private secondary schools have a negative impact on the young generation and the society alike. Discuss both views.

some people think that libraries are a waste of ressources and money. so computers should replace them. however,others do not agree. discuss both sides and give your opinion

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answers.