Bringing in foreign workers to fill positions that domestic workers are unwilling to do can cause problems in the local community and should, therefore, be stopped. Do what extent do you agree with this.

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It is said that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
foreign
workers
should be stopped to fill positions that domestic
workers
do not want because it will cause issues in the local
community
. I disagree with
this
statement because of the importance of diversity and foreign
workers
bring
Wrong verb form
bringing
show examples
in economic growth in the local
community
. Nowadays, more people are migrating to other countries for better job
opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
show examples
, their
also
bring their culture and moral values
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
country
they are migrating
too
Correct your spelling
to
show examples
. Local people learn to broaden their
perspective
Fix the agreement mistake
perspectives
show examples
by learning from them. Diversity
enchances
Correct your spelling
enhances
understanding ,
empathy
Correct word choice
and empathy
show examples
and
hence
bring more harmony
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
community
.
For example
, America is a melting pot of many cultures and ethnicity and is considered to be one of the happiest
country
Change to a plural noun
countries
show examples
in the world.
Moreover
, foreign
workers
bring
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
knowledges
Change the wording
knowledge
pieces of knowledge
bits of knowledge
show examples
and knowledge
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
organization
Add an article
an organization
the organization
show examples
that domestic
workers
does
Change the verb form
do
show examples
not have. They can train domestic
worker
Fix the agreement mistake
workers
show examples
to be more skilled and eventually bring innovation
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
country
which
improve
Change the verb form
improves
show examples
the economic growth of the
community
.
For example
, Saudi
arabia
Change the capitalization
Arabia
show examples
is one of
richest
Add an article
the richest
show examples
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
in the world because they hired skilled foreign
workers
and train
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
local
workers
and now they work together to bring solutions to the issues in the
community
. In conclusion,
Forieign
Correct your spelling
Foreign
workers
help the
country
by
diversify
Change the verb form
diversifying
show examples
the
community
and
bring
Wrong verb form
bringing
show examples
creativity, innovation and economic growth to the
country
and the
community
.
Submitted by khan.sarah630 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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