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Band 5

Write about the following topic: The environmental problems that today's world is facing are so great. So government and large organizations should be responsible for reducing the amount of damage being done to the environment. The what extent so you agreed or disagree?

#topic #world #government #organizations #amount #damage #environment
In the modern world due to various activities done by the government and large scale
industries
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,industries
show examples
 there
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 been numerous
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
 problems. Many
Fix the agreement mistake
environmentalists
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environmentalist
Correct your spelling
environmentalists
show examples
 and organizations highlight that rulers and businesses should take
approprite
Correct your spelling
appropriate
 timely action to minimize the impacts. As a responsible
citizen
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,citizen
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 I too agree
on
Change preposition
with
show examples
 the above and as part of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nature
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,nature
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 we should take action to minimize
such
 effects. Environmental problems arise in land, water,
air
Correct word choice
and air
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 and one of the main
contributers
Correct your spelling
contributors
 are the excavations done to extract minerals. These large scale manufacturers are funded by the rulers or multinational companies.
For
example
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,example
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 the largest diamond mines in South Africa
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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controled
Correct your spelling
controlled
 by the government, which creates large land mass movements disturbing the ecosystem and these craters are kept open after
shutdown
Correct article usage
the shutdown
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.
Nevertheless
, the government does not take ownership to rectify the above situation.
Furthermore
, large
oil
 tanks transport crude
oil
 across the globe, which is mainly done by private shipping lines. On some
occasions
Add a comma
,occasions
show examples
 there can be
an
Correct the article-noun agreement
an oil spill
oil spills
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oil
 spills, due to technical
fault
Fix the agreement mistake
faults
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, but the damage caused due to the
oil
 is beyond repair.
Although
, the shipping company will do
cleaning
Wrong verb form
clean
show examples
 up and
paying
Wrong verb form
pay
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 compensation the damage done to the ecosystem is much greater.
This
 was observed when a cargo ship met with an accident off the Eastern
Correct your spelling
coast
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cost
Correct your spelling
coast
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 of Sri Lanka. To conclude, the rulers and large companies are
directely
Correct your spelling
directly
 involved in
environment
Replace the word
environmental
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catestrophis
Correct your spelling
catastrophic
catastrophes
, but they do not take any
precausionay
Correct your spelling
precautionary
 steps to overcome the
next
occurance
Correct your spelling
occurrence
.
Therfore
Correct your spelling
Therefore
, I agree
on
Change preposition
with
show examples
 the above and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society should take
neccessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
 action to make them more responsible.
Submitted by rashikag2000 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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