The greater proportion of government's budget should be allocated to disease prevention and health education because prevention is better than cure. Do you agree or disagree?
The administration should use a large part of
their
budget on the medical sector and Correct pronoun usage
its
health
study because Use synonyms
health
is the key to life. Use synonyms
Although
, it provided a number of opportunities to students who have a dream to become doctors. I completely agree with the statement and in the following ,paragraphs we will discuss all the views of the essay.
Linking Words
To begin
with, there are a plethora of benefits if a government spend the most amount of their economy on healthcare Linking Words
material
and education Fix the agreement mistake
materials
centre
. Fix the agreement mistake
centres
Firstly
, it will be made affordable to people who do not have enough money to get more treatment which is required for the improvement in their Linking Words
health
. Use synonyms
For example
, in many African ,countries most public dies Linking Words
due to
a lack of Linking Words
health
apparatus. Use synonyms
Secondly
, it Linking Words
also
affects the economic condition of the community, Linking Words
however
, Linking Words
due to
the lack of advanced Linking Words
health
amenities individuals have to move to another country, so, if they get the same machinery in their region it will be an advantage for the province. Use synonyms
Last
but not least, in the present era, competition is increasing day by day, Linking Words
hence
, if they invest more in Linking Words
this
field, students who want to get admission Linking Words
in
the medical sector can get a chance to fulfil their dream because of less number of colleges, some pupils can not get desire score in the exam ,Change preposition
to
Linking Words
consequently
they have changed their future plan.
Add a comma
consequently,
Furthermore
, tourist attractions play a vital role in the economy of any democracy, because nowadays people like to go the places where they can feel safe and can get basic energy-related furnishings Linking Words
easy
, if a country is able to prevent all diseases, more visitors will be come to spend their leisure time in that particular area which Change the word
easily
also
increases the employment of the region. Linking Words
For example
, during the Covid-19 pandemic to protect their Linking Words
population
many countries stop their businesses and movement of people to specific nations around the world that have found more cases.
Add a comma
population,
To conclude
, improvement in the field of fitness is necessary to become a healthy union so the government is spending most of the part of its budget to improve it. Linking Words
This
not only, Linking Words
make
the society financially strong but Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
also
, Linking Words
help
to provide employment to the public Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
as well as
Linking Words
increase
the scope for the student to learn about well-being education.Correct subject-verb agreement
increases
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coherence cohesion
Ensure a more structured approach by clearly separating paragraphs for each main point, ensuring a logical flow.
task achievement
Clarify and elaborate on the point about the impact of healthcare investment on education and students' opportunities.
coherence cohesion
The essay's introduction and conclusion succinctly present the main argument and summarize the points discussed.
task achievement
The essay provides relevant examples, such as referencing African countries and the Covid-19 pandemic, to support arguments.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.