IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Some people think younger leaders would be better. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #leaders
The graph illustrates the amount of money a particular country earned selling items in five different spheres, in 2015 and 2016. The table provides information about the shifts in costs of these tools in these years Overall, the income from sales in all sections except agriculture rose over the period. The gems and jewellery were the only items in
this
 group that dropped in value. The output from the sales of the petroleum
products
 and engineering goods constituted just over 60 and about 57
billion
dollars
, respectively, in 2015, while the income from these sections a year later was approximately at the same level, at approximately 63
billion
dollars
. The profit from the export of gems and jewellery declined over the period. It was at about 43 and 41
billion
dollars
, in 2015 and 2016 respectively. the outcome of sales in the agriculture section experienced a slight increase by about a
billion
dollars
 and reached 31
billion
 in the
last
 year. The export of the textile
products
 made up just over 30
billion
dollars
 in 2016, rising the previous year's outcome by about 6
billion
. The most significant changes in the 2015-2016 period were in the value of the engineering goods and textile
products
, at 8.5% and about 15%. The rise in the cost of agricultural
products
 comprised a mere 0.81 %. The gems and jewellery declined by approximately 5.2 %, while the petroleum
products
 rose in price by 3%.
Submitted by jaker.raimov on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: