IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that getting a degree from a university is the best way to guarantee a good job others believe that it would be better to go straight into work and get experience instead.

#people #university #guarantee #job #work
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Some would argue that obtaining a bachelor's or master's degree increases your chances
to be
Change preposition
of being
show examples
 hired for a well-paid
job
Use synonyms
 for sure,
while
Linking Words
 others say that it would be preferable to directly take a
job
Use synonyms
 and get experience
instead
Linking Words
.
While
Linking Words
 some might argue that studying at the
university
Use synonyms
 is just
wasting
Wrong verb form
a waste of
show examples
 your valuable
time
Use synonyms
, I believe that it is better to apply there and get some professional knowledge. On the one hand, it is believed that by studying at the
university
Use synonyms
 a person just spends his
time
Use synonyms
 in vain. In fact, it takes four years and some people think that
instead
Linking Words
 of studying, it would be better to apply for a
job
Use synonyms
 and get some new skills and experience.
For example
Linking Words
, my friend, who used to be my classmate, is now working even though he has a chance to enter
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
university
Use synonyms
. He thinks it is not important.
However
Linking Words
, I believe that studying is the best way to get much better and more fascinating work in the future.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it is known that
while
Linking Words
 you are practising in your faculty, you spend a lot of
time
Use synonyms
 on research, reports and other tasks which will create opportunities to gain professional knowledge in abundance.
This
Linking Words
 data will be utilized in your future profession.
For example
Linking Words
, it is a major requirement for multicultural companies to hold a
job
Use synonyms
 interview prior to hiring a specialist for the vacant position.
Therefore
Linking Words
, having basic and theoretical knowledge about the
job
Use synonyms
 would make the chances
to be
Change preposition
of being
show examples
 employed much rosier. I believe that
this
Linking Words
 method is more beneficial because it will lead you to a
job
Use synonyms
 in any international company with a high salary. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 some people believe that learning at
university
Use synonyms
 is just a waste of
time
Use synonyms
, in my opinion, it is crucial to get a degree in the field you are going to work because the education you attain there will increase your chances
to be
Change preposition
of being
show examples
 paid well.
Submitted by fkorchiyev on

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coherence cohesion
Develop your introduction and conclusion to provide a clearer overview of your main points and arguments. Use topic sentences to explicitly express the main idea of each paragraph.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • higher education
  • specialized fields
  • job prospects
  • earning potential
  • formal education
  • networking opportunities
  • career advancement
  • practical skills
  • work environment
  • financial independence
  • high costs
  • skills and experience
  • formal education
  • prioritize
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