Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

It is a debated topic
that
Correct word choice
apply
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whether
parents
should direct their offspring on how to consume their free time by participating in group
Correct your spelling
activities
activites
Correct your spelling
activities
or leave them to choose how to use the aforementioned alone. Both sides will be discussed in
this
essay. On the one hand, there
are
Change the verb form
is
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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high competition in all types of occupations nowadays which made the
parents
panic about their
children
's future.
This
is probably why they want their
kids
to benefit from their free time.
For instance
,
in
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during
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summer break,
children
can work
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
volunteering at public service or
charity
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a charity
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organization
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organizations
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.
Hence
, acquired new skills as well as learned to work in
team
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a team
show examples
which is
very
Add an article
a very
show examples
important skill for their career.
On the other hand
, there are other
parents
who prefer to leave
kids
Correct pronoun usage
their kids
show examples
to choose their
activity
Fix the agreement mistake
activities
show examples
.
This
is because they want to build the child's personality y letting him make his own decision. In fact,
children
are more creative when they left to do the things they like because usually they would be excited and hard to get bored and quit.
For example
, in Oman,
children
are enrolled in courses that have been selected by them to support their hobbies.
Hence
, build new generations that are independent and can easily make their choices in life. To conclude, while some
parents
prefer to enrol their
kids
in group activities in pleasure times, others think that youngsters should be left alone to make their choice on how to spend their holidays. I think that
kids
should make their own choice because it is the best way for them to be refreshed and
enthusiasm
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enthusiastic
show examples
to continue their journey in life.
Submitted by Simsima161 on

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Your opinion

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • encourage
  • occupied
  • organized
  • group activities
  • benefits
  • social
  • teamwork skills
  • interpersonal skills
  • friendship
  • discipline
  • time management
  • interests
  • hobbies
  • independent play
  • creativity
  • problem-solving skills
  • self-reliance
  • explore
  • discover
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