Nowadays, many families move overseas for job opportunities. Some people think that this is beneficial for the children of these families while others think that children will find it difficult. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Today, many
families
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

migrate
foreign
Change preposition
to foreign

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
for work opportunities. Some are of the opinion
that is
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

advantageous for the
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

of these
families
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

; whereas a few
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others

It seems that other may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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state
Change the wording
states

The adjective other appears to be modifying the singular noun state. Consider making a change.

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that
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

will observe more difficult.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, ahead of my
preference
Add a comma
,preference

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase ahead of my preference. Consider adding a comma.

show examples
both viewpoints would be discussed. Discussing the former view the proponent reason that,the
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

learn
foreign
Add an article
a foreign

The noun phrase foreign language seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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language
Fix the agreement mistake
languages

It seems that language may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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so they speak English
fluency
Replace the word
fluently

The word fluency doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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and speak with
Correct pronoun usage
others

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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other
Fix the agreement mistake
others

It seems that other may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
without any fear.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, nowadays, many
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

do not participate
speaking
Change preposition
in speaking

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
concerns because of their stage fear.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

get higher education and job opportunities
in
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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abroad.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

learn their
culture
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

because Indian
culture
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and foreign
culture
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

are very different .
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, when women live foreign country so they dress up
their
Change preposition
in their

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

culture
Replace the word
cultural

The word culture doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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clothes and they
are
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb are appears to be unnecessary here.

show examples
live
India
Change preposition
in India

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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so they wear traditional dress.
On the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, there are some problems
of
Change preposition
with

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
working with
families
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
To begin
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

with, both the parents are working so there
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is

It seems that the verb are does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

show examples
no
Correct your spelling
not

The word no doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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enough time
Fix the infinitive
to spend
show examples
spend
Wrong verb form
spent

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb spend. Consider changing it.

show examples
with
there
Correct your spelling
their

The word there doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, working with
family
Correct article usage
a family

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
can provide complete love and care to the
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
Further
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

do not learn
their
Change preposition
about their

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
culture
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

because
of
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
they live
in
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
abroad. many people feel homesick and lonely and
Correct your spelling
therefore
therfore
Correct your spelling
therefore

If you don’t want therfore to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

cannot adjust
in
Change preposition
to

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
the
Correct article usage
a

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
foreign country. Many
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

do not make friends because they are do not know how their
person
Replace the word
personal

The word person doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour

The spelling of behavior is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

show examples
and
they
Correct word choice
whether they

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

show examples
good or not To sum up and offer my position I would support the latter opinion
Correct your spelling
to
ot
Correct your spelling
to

If you don’t want ot to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

a large extent.
Although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

some
believe
Replace the word
belief

The word believe doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
that
live
Replace the word
life

The word live doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
with
families
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
abroad
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

show examples
is
a
Change the article
apply

It appears that the article a is unnecessary before the adjective advantageous. Consider making a change.

show examples
advantageous.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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