given high unemployment rate, it is recommended that the government only provide primary education and no secondary education. what do you think

#unemployment #rate #government #education

this

modern era,

education

plays an important role in everyone's life. Without

education

, we can not survive easily in

this

world. some people think that due to the unemployment rate the authority has only to provide primary

education

except secondary

education

. I am totally against

Change preposition

apply

show examples

this

statement in the upcoming paragraphs I will discuss my viewpoints. To commence with, secondary

education

is the main part of

education

without

this

the person is uneducated, and if they are uneducated

then

the chances of crime increase

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

also

rose up. because mostly the uneducated masses do

crime

Fix the agreement mistake

crimes

show examples

because they do not have any skills with the help

Change preposition

apply

show examples

they can earn money so that's why they choose the wrong way to earn money.

For example

, Due to a survey of police, most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the criminals are uneducated.

that is

the reason they have no emotions. Moving

further

, If the government cannot provide secondary

education

then

most of the learners who are under the poverty line how

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

can get that

education

Moreover

, In that part of

education

, the students learn skills and

also

know which stream they choose in

further

education

that is

a turning point in students' life and if the authority cannot provide secondary

education

then

most part of the nation is uneducated. because not everyone affords private

education

For instance

, In India, about one-

third

of the population is under the poverty line

then

how they can get a private

education

. To conclude, no doubt the unemployment rate is high in India but it does not mean that the government cut their secondary

education

is the

first

and foremost right of everyone. they have to cut others any unnecessary things except secondary

education

Submitted by gsdpatti on Tue Jun 28 2022

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

286 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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given high unemployment rate, it is recommended that the government only provide primary education and no secondary education. what do you think

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

some people think that children should only read academic book. other believe that reading books for pleasure is equally important. Discuss both views and give your opi nion.

Directors large organisations earn much higher salaries than ordinary employees. Some people think it is necessary, but others believe that it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your opinion

In some countries, the number of shooting massacres is on the rise because many people have guns at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Some people believe that time spent on television, video and computer games can be valuable for children. Others beleve this may have negative effects on a child's development. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some pople believe that children should be taught academic subject at school, while other think that teaching pratical skills is more important. discuss both view and give your own opinion.