IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

write a letter to your manager to request setting up cafeteria for staffs. how you feel about it what you heard about inconvenience what suggestion you can give

#manager #request #cafeteria #staffs #inconvenience #suggestion
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Subject: Requesting permission to set up
cafeteria
Use synonyms
 for
staffs
Fix the agreement mistake
staff
show examples
. Dear Sir, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter on behalf of our
staffs
Fix the agreement mistake
staff
show examples
 for requesting permission to set up
Use synonyms
cafeteria
Correct article usage
a cafeteria
show examples
 within our office building. I feel that our employees are currently wasting a good amount of time walking in the hot weather outside to go to nearby restaurants and shops. Since
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 the outdoor conditions in
this
Linking Words
 city
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 extreme, I too think it is necessary to provide at least a small
cafeteria
Use synonyms
 and pantry for our people. I heard from our old colleagues that having a dining place creates a lot of
Correct your spelling
inconvenience
convenience
inconvinience
Correct your spelling
inconvenience
 due to the hygiene and smell issues.
Moreover
Linking Words
, I was told that many of our team members would use the place for chit-chatting purposes. If we do
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
proper planning in terms of design and construction we can ensure that the smell issues arising can be completely avoided by providing proper ventilation and exhaust systems.
Similarly
Linking Words
, a full-time cleaning company must be employed to make sure that
cleanliness
Correct article usage
the cleanliness
show examples
 of the eating area is maintained to our office standards.
Also
Linking Words
, we will have to train our managers to educate all office
staffs
Fix the agreement mistake
staff
show examples
 to use
Use synonyms
cafeteria
Add an article
the cafeteria
show examples
 for its purpose only. To conclude, I believe that providing a
cafeteria
Use synonyms
 would enhance the image of the company's management
within
Change preposition
among
show examples
 the workers and it has
direct
Add an article
a direct
show examples
 impact on their well-being. I hope from
this
Linking Words
 letter the management understands the need to have
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
dedicated eating and acts on it at the earliest. Thanking you.
Submitted by msrinivas7866 on

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The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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