ou should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Children today play very violent games. This must be the reason for the increase in violence and crime in most major cities of the world. What are your opinions on this? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experienc

Nowadays, in many regions, more teens take part in working. Some people argue that it is worthwhile for teenagers ,and they can cultivate their skills and have responsibility . In
this
essay, I agree with it. People believe that children shouldn’t take up paid work because it cuts juveniles off their childhood.
Furthermore
, they spend all their
time
in
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apply
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working and studying. They almost lose their childhood.
For example
,
a
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apply
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research reveals that child models’ whole day is divided into
three
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three-time
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time
groups. The
first
is 8 hours for schooling, the
second
is 5 hours for working. And
the
Correct your spelling
they
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remain
Change the verb form
remaining
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one is for their leisure
time
. It means that they have a few entertainment activities like making friends and playing. It really affects their mental health and their personal
developments
Fix the agreement mistake
development
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.
However
, if teenagers take up jobs, they can build
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
solid value. To be specific, they can understand how they save or spend their money.
For example
, some findings show that adolescents who are working become more thrifty than their peers. On top of that, juveniles can master skills
such
as leadership skills.
For example
, competitive schools are
not
Correct your spelling
no
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longer
focus
Wrong verb form
focused
show examples
on academics, and they are looking for leaders. People who like
this
can get more excellent university offers. In conclusion, when children enter the workplace, they might feel tired and they have less
time
to
relaxed
Wrong verb form
relax
show examples
.
However
, I believe that they can learn about how to save money. In
additional
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addition
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, their work experience makes them become more competitive. They can get more opportunities.
Submitted by youhua94 on

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