IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Doctors, nurses and teacher make a great contribution to society and should be payed more than entertainment and sport celebrities. Do you agree or disagree?

#doctors #nurses #teacher #contribution #society #entertainment #sport #celebrities
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The nap boxes are designed by Itoki. In Japan, firms didn't disapprove of taking a nap at the workplace. A full-
time
Use synonyms
 worker does an average of 180 hours monthly. Well, I think that it will be useful relaxing equipment, especially in Japan. You know. Japan is famous for
hard-working
Replace the word
hard work
show examples
, and
also
Linking Words
 for overwork death. Designing suitable furniture, which takes up as small
area
Correct article usage
an area
show examples
 as possible, is very helpful.At my workplace,
staffs
Fix the agreement mistake
staff
show examples
 always have lunch breaks, which
last
Linking Words
 for an hour. I often feel more active and energetic thanks to my break period. Well, I think that in the morning and after break
time
Use synonyms
, I am most productive at work. After these periods, I feel more logical and sensitive. I think that a raise in salary is helpful. Most of my colleagues complain about inflation. They think that they
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
 a
lot
Use synonyms
 of
time
Use synonyms
 working, and so they
suit
Wrong verb form
are suited
show examples
 for higher salaries. I work over 200 hours monthly. The doctor is a busy job. I do the day shift,
night-shift
Correct your spelling
shift
show examples
. I
also
Linking Words
 have to attend a
lot
Use synonyms
 of conferences and continuous medical education courses. My direct manager. She works really hard. I have seen that she still works at break
time
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 and in the late evening. One of my colleagues,
named
Verb problem
apply
show examples
Hoa, always is overworked. She not
even
Rephrase
only
show examples
 works hard at the workplace, but she
also
Linking Words
 does a
lot
Use synonyms
 of household chores. Of course not. In my country, there is an increasing trend of working
time
Use synonyms
. Many officers, teachers and bankers still
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
work in the late evening, especially on the
last
Linking Words
 days of each month. Well, I want to say " It is absolutely true". Not that I love sleeping, but a
lot
Use synonyms
 of people become more productive, active, energetic, and logical after their sleep.
Submitted by ntlanh92 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • critical role
  • healthcare professionals
  • societal well-being
  • disparity in income
  • skewed values
  • essential services
  • remuneration
  • mitigate
  • global shortages
  • inherent value
  • nurturing
  • compensation
  • societal contributions
  • profound impact
  • equitable distribution
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