IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#university #education #job #hand #people #skills
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Education
Use synonyms
 is thought to be a legacy and
people
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 strife hard to acquire
education
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,
this
Linking Words
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
 many
people
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to
Change preposition
apply
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opined that
higher
Correct article usage
a higher
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level
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 of
education
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 will bring a better job opportunity, but
majority
Add an article
the majority
a majority
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 of
people
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 thought
experience
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 and acquiring skills
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 more efficient.
This
Linking Words
 essay will
highlights
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highlight
show examples
 some
point
Fix the agreement mistake
points
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for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 both views and give
Add an article
an opinion
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opinion
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opinions
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.
To begin
Linking Words
, many
people
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 who thought acquiring
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education
Correct article usage
an education
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 can grant a better opportunity thinks in term of
company
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 employment which require
some
Correct determiner usage
a
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 certain
level
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 of
education
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 before the job can be granted.
For
Linking Words
instance
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,instance
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 according to a
company
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who
Correct pronoun usage
that
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 posted an advertisement,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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part of their requirements is an
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advance
Replace the word
advanced
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level
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 of
education
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 like(MSC) and
people
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 who do not have the required
level
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 are not
qualify
Wrong verb form
qualified
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 to apply.
Moreover
Linking Words
, many
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company
Change to a plural noun
companies
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 hire an
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advance
Replace the word
advanced
show examples
level
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 of
education
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 because they thought
this
Linking Words
 will hard value to their
organization
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 and boost their visibility.
Also
Linking Words
, many
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organization
Fix the agreement mistake
organizations
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 require
this
Linking Words
 so that the employee will be efficient and capable of handling and
manage
Wrong verb form
managing
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 the
company
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 very well through the knowledge being acquired from the school. Meanwhile, some basic
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organization
Fix the agreement mistake
organizations
show examples
 want to employ them so they can represent the
company
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 globally.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some
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organization
Fix the agreement mistake
organizations
show examples
 are in quest for
experience
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, they thought the
level
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 of
experience
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 will make the employee perform effectively, and will be able to solve a task without bringing any issue to the
organization
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.
Additionally
Linking Words
, some
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organization
Fix the agreement mistake
organizations
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 like the
company
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 that deals with electricity need some
level
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 of
experience
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 in the field to avoid
Correct your spelling
committing
commenting
commiting
Correct your spelling
committing
 error.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
people
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 who thought that
experience
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 matter most
speaks
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speak
show examples
 in term of some profession that needs some
level
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 of
experience
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 before being employed. In an advertisement of one
company
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 that
major
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majors
show examples
 in
production
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the production
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 of
manual
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manuals
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 for agriculture they require some
level
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 of requirements which my niece who
employed
Add a missing verb
was employed
show examples
then
Linking Words
was not qualify
Change the verb form
did not qualify
show examples
 because he did not meet up the requirement. In conclusion, both
Use synonyms
level
Change to a plural noun
levels
show examples
 of
education
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 and
experience
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 matter most and both
compliment
Correct your spelling
complement
show examples
 each other. In
healthcare
Correct article usage
the healthcare
show examples
 field skills and
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education
Add a comma
,education
show examples
Use synonyms
education
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
are required to be able to carry out the job efficiently. In my opinion, I think
Use synonyms
level
Add an article
the level
show examples
 of
education
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 matter most because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 in an
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advance
Replace the word
advanced
show examples
 country the qualifications will
speaks
Change the verb form
speak
show examples
 in the curriculum vitae rather than
experience
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 and most need an
Use synonyms
advance
Replace the word
advanced
show examples
level
Use synonyms
 of
education
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by adedayoadesewa1 on

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • theoretical knowledge
  • specialized training
  • networking
  • baseline requirement
  • financial burden
  • hands-on experience
  • practical skills
  • soft skills
  • dynamic job market
  • entrepreneur
  • formal education
  • portfolio
  • hybrid approach
What to do next:
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