New household appliances have resulted in more free time for women and has enabled them to both work and run a home with dependent children. What are the advantages for a family when the mother works? Do you think the disadvantages outweigh the advantages?
In
these day
and age, cutting-edge inventions make women’s Change the determiner
this day
these days
life
easier by doing some household Fix the agreement mistake
lives
works
, which they may have their own careers and spend more Fix the agreement mistake
work
times
with their children. Fix the agreement mistake
time
This
essay will explore the advantages of this
where I believed
that the merits outweigh its demerits, and the reasons will be provided in the following paragraphs. On the one hand, with the assistance of some household equipment, women can have a chance to find an occupation for Wrong verb form
believe
additional
salary, which may improve the economic status of their families. Correct article usage
an additional
That is
to say that a wide range of prices hike significantly all around the world, a dual income
family may tackle Add a hyphen
dual-income
this
issue better. China News reported that in 2021, the egg’s price in Taiwan rose remarkably from $2 to $5 for ten eggs that dual income
families were more affordable. Add a hyphen
dual-income
Furthermore
, working women can provide more financial security to their families. In other words
, the unemployment rate is high all around the world, if one of the parents lose
their job, they still afford living expenses. Correct subject-verb agreement
loses
For instance
, the unemployment rate in Taiwan is 3.68% during the pandemic year, my aunt is unemployed; however
, they still can use my uncle’s salary to pay their bills. On the other hand
, some opine that mothers who have works
may sacrifice some time to accompany their children and husbands. Fix the agreement mistake
work
Nevertheless
, an appointment can be made among family members that arrange an activity together once a week. For example
, I was born in
a double career family; Change preposition
into
however
, my parents always plan
an activity to do with me Wrong verb form
planned
in
every weekend, which Change preposition
apply
closer
Add a missing verb
is closer
our
relationship. In conclusion, new devices Change preposition
to our
using
Wrong verb form
used
at
housework Change preposition
for
helps
women to have their own jobs to improve Correct subject-verb agreement
help
economic
status of Add an article
the economic
family
; Add an article
the family
a family
in addition
, it provides more financial security to the households, which overshadow
the demerits Correct subject-verb agreement
overshadows
that
is
problems Change the verb form
are
on
lessChange preposition
of
of
time Change preposition
apply
to spend
with family members.Change the verb form
spent
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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.
A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).
Stick to this essay structure:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
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