IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Salary is the main consideration when choosing a job.To what extent do you agree or disagree with that idea?

People how much
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
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they have income decide how much their
Use synonyms
life
Replace the word
lives
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 are perfect. People who live
on
Change preposition
in
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 the world are rotating
day
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 to
day
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 lives with eating, wearing,
socializing
Correct word choice
and socializing
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. All these activities are based on each and everyone’s financial scope
that
Correct word choice
and
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 how much they earn.
Therefore
Linking Words
, earning is
most
Correct article usage
the most
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 important element in our
life
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. People are trying to get
higher
Add a hyphen
higher-salary
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salary
Use synonyms
 jobs in order to fulfil their desired lifestyles. Money can settle most of the problems especially your
Use synonyms
day to
Add a hyphen
day-to-day
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day
Use synonyms
 living standard. Sometimes it can
also
Linking Words
 be a solution for family lifestyle,
healthcare
Correct word choice
and healthcare
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 problems. If you are smart enough to handle money wisely, you will be king of your
life
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, Mark
Zukerberg
Correct your spelling
Zuckerberg
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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is the CEO of Meta social media. He earns million
dollars
Change preposition
of dollars
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 a year and manages his family
life
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 peacefully. Nobody
cannot
Rewrite the sentence
can
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 refuse it
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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because of
largely
Replace the word
large
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impact
Wrong verb form
impacted
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by
Change preposition
of
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 his huge income. There is one thing to be acknowledged
that
Correct word choice
apply
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nothing will happen automatically unless enthusiastic efforts. As much as higher
salary
Use synonyms
 income, as much
as
Change preposition
apply
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hard
Add a hyphen
hard-working
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working
Replace the word
work
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 and high professional skills are required. And it does note that family is
also
Linking Words
 the most important part of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
Use synonyms
, our
life
Use synonyms
 cannot be perfect without
a
Remove the article
apply
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happy family
life
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
Add a hyphen
work-life
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work
Add a hyphen
work-life
show examples
life
Use synonyms
 balance is
also
Linking Words
 an unforgettable consideration in your working with
high
Correct article usage
a high
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salary
Use synonyms
life
Use synonyms
. In summary, it is unquestionable that
salary
Use synonyms
 is the most important consideration in
life
Use synonyms
. It can create pleasant and happy lifestyles with your family, health care and community.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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