Most Children want to watch the same TV programmes or play the same video games as their friends. Do you think parents should allow their children to do this ?

#children #tv #programmes #video #games #friends #parents

A lot of

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children

childrent

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children

copycate

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copycat

copycats

their

friends

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friend's

friends'

show examples

likes in TV

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programmes

programs

programes

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programmes

or video

games

. There are some

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reasons

resons

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reasons

why I believe

parents

should not allow their

children

to do

this

. Namely, they may watch and play unsuitable

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programmes

programs

programes

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programs

and

games

, it is assumed they do not learn to make choices and always want to copy their friends

tast

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that

tasting

toast

However

, some people have different points of view that will be discussed in the following essay. Watching and playing the same as their mate have some drawbacks for

children

Initially

those entertainment

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that entertainment

those entertainments

show examples

may not be good for their age and

also

may

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contain

content

containt

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contain

violent

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scenes

sciences

science

scences

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scenes

and concepts that have harmful effects on their minds.

For instance

, some video

games

are full of violence

Add the comma(s)

,in

show examples

addition, they may persuade

children

to copy them.

Additionally

, they will not learn to make choices because they copy their

friends

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friend's

friends'

show examples

likes and never make decisions for

themeself

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themself

himself

thus

it could reduce their

self confidence

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self-confidence

show examples

On the other hand

, it is believed that

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apply

show examples

parents

should allow their

children

to do it

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because

firstly

they are

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show examples

the age that

want

Change the verb form

wants

show examples

to experience

the same ages entertainment

Change to a genitive case

the entertainment of the same ages

the entertainment of the same age

show examples

and if

parents

forbiden

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forbidden

forbid

them they may watch and play those types of movies and

games

witout

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without

their

parents

knowing.

Secondly

, they are likely to be

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separated

seperated

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separated

from their classmates

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because

becuase

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because

they can not participate in their

disscutiones

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dissections

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about

obout

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about

those kinds of hobbies. In conclusion, because of

bad

Correct article usage

the bad

show examples

effects that may

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caused

coused

Add a missing verb

be coused

show examples

by those

Correct your spelling

programmes

programs

programes

Correct your spelling

programmes

and

games

parents

should not allow their

children

to choose them without thinking .

Submitted by ranjbari4526 on Tue Aug 16 2022

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
39Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

258 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.5

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Most Children want to watch the same TV programmes or play the same video games as their friends. Do you think parents should allow their children to do this ?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

You recently sent some documents by post, but they did not arrive. Write a letter to the post manager. In your letter Give details of the situation Describe the documents Say what action you want the post office to take.

Today, there are more television channels than ever before. Some people think this leads to more choices for television viewers. Others, however, believe this causes the quality of television programmes to decline. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new fast trains between cities. others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that when buying a product(for example, a mobile or cell phone) or choosing a service (e.g. medical treatment) , price is the most important thing to consider. Do you agree or disagree?