IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Nowadays online shopping has become more popular than store shopping. Is it a positive or negative development?

#store #development
In the modern age,
people
 have become habituated to the use of
new
Replace the word
newly
show examples
 developed technologies, in
such
 a scenario online shopping has come
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 vogue rather than conventional shopping. It has imparted on societies with positive and negative directions, which is discussed in the ensuing paragraphs
ere
Correct your spelling
are
show examples
 a logical conclusion is evolved. To commence with, in today's populace online shopping has become part of their lifestyle. With the help of different online shopping applications, folks can easily purchase
Correct your spelling
anything
show examples
any thing
Correct your spelling
anything
show examples
 at every nook and canny from their comfort zones.
In addition
 to
this
, by purchasing online,
masses
Correct article usage
the masses
show examples
 can get
enormous
Add an article
an enormous
show examples
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
show examples
 of discounts on purchased items.
For instance
, 'Amazon' is the most popular
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
all over the world, through which one can order any items
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
 a reasonable price.
This
 stands as an epitome.
The another
Remove the article
Another
show examples
 reason which supports online shopping is that
common
Correct article usage
the common
show examples
 race can easily access the product by using filter option as per their taste,
this
altemately
Correct your spelling
ultimately
alternately
 saves the time in today's
hectik
Correct your spelling
hectic
 schedule. To cite an example, in my country 'India', more and more masses use
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
online sites to buy clothes, furniture, accessories and medicines,
that
Correct word choice
which
show examples
 itself proves a point.
Nonetheless
, online shopping has become in trend, it has
also
 some drawbacks.
Firstly
, online
Correct your spelling
applications
application
application's
applicationd
Correct your spelling
applications
 allure
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
 to buy more than they require by attracting advertisements and discounts, so at times
people
 squander more money on things.
Secondly
, if one can not have knowledge regarding
to
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
brand, sometimes
people
 purchased
low quality
Add a hyphen
low-quality
show examples
 products, that in
tern
Correct your spelling
turn
show examples
 leads to the wastage of money. In nutshell, online shopping has been influenced positively as its ramifications could be nullifying
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the axiom, "Necessity is the mother of inventions".
Hence
, I believed that it is a positive development.
Submitted by hardikpatel0406 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: