IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

As well as making money,businesses have social responsibilities,Do you agree or dis agree?

In the modern era, business
play
Change the verb form
plays
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 a vital role in our society, which has a huge part in
country's
Correct article usage
the country's
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 economy so some responsibility up individuals to them. In my opinion, please statement is extremely right and they should be doing it.
First
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 of all, they should sell healthier products, which do not harmful to the body. If
people
Use synonyms
 have it, it will impact on them so that they are facing some bad diseases,
For example
Linking Words
, the strong chemical was used by the many countries
last
Linking Words
 year
that is
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 the reason, which decreases the health right in many countries.
as a result
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, it
also
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 obstructs economy.
Moreover
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, they must not advertise, which
tohas
Correct your spelling
has
 include narcotic substances because
of
Change preposition
apply
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people
Use synonyms
 will be addicted to them.
consequently
Linking Words
, they become all as your as in the past.
furthermore
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, they should do some social work, what is
encourage
Change the form of the verb
encouraging
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people
Use synonyms
 to do something, which
help
Change the verb form
helps
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to
Change preposition
apply
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our society or Nations.
consequently
Linking Words
, patriotism awakens in
people
Use synonyms
's hearts. In my point of view, the industry must do some voluntary work, which is helpful to their particular nation
such
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 as some businessman donate their property to the government during a corona pending
that is
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 the reason the country was overcome rapidly at that time. In conclusion, the pursuit must take liability for their country,
however
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, they are not able to give every month my point of view, whenever society needs help,
then
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 there will come
first
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 for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
help.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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